Sure, he liked to joke about it, but given how enormous his others parts were . . . I was more than curious.
Nate folded his arms, looking at something in the distance and my lens edged in on his face. His full lips, slightly off-center nose, and large eyes, framed by long and lush lashes. Yep, he was definitely a pretty boy.
For the first time I noticed a light smattering of freckles that dotted his cheeks and I had the urge to lick them all, one by one. I adjusted the hair that was now sticking to my neck, because I was getting all hot and bothered while picturing Nate naked.
“Dude, you done with the shot or what?” he said, startling me out of my thoughts.
I panned the lens away from him. “Don’t rush me.”
He grinned and then stuck out his tongue as I zoomed back in. Seeing that tongue in high definition made me nearly swallow my own. All my girly parts went liquid as I imagined what it would feel like inside my mouth and then travelling down my skin.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were just fucking with me now,” he said. “Getting some evidence to blackmail me with or something.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I said. “What evidence?”
“Who knows—of my nose hairs,” he said, smirking. “Or maybe my extremely large package. That must be it. You needed a tight shot on that.”
“What package?” I said, aiming my camera lower while grasping at the ground for a stick. “I can barely find it.”
Then I flung the twig at him and he knocked it out of the way, laughing.
“Okay, I’m done,” I said, standing up. “Now get the hell out of my shot.”
After a few more snaps, I lowered the camera and headed toward the water’s edge. I sat on a large rock and he joined me on the other side, his one knee up, his elbow resting across it. He no longer looked distressed, only at peace. And it must have had to do with this location, this pond, and his memory.
After a minute more of staring into the water, I said, “How can I get closer to that bridge?”
“Hop in the car, I’ll show you.”
Chapter Ten
Nate
I directed Jessie around the pond using the back roads. She still wouldn’t let me drive, even though I knew exactly where we were headed. Maybe she liked being directed, bossed around even— though she could be quite dictatorial herself. That thought alone made the front of my pants stretch tight.
Being back in this town sucked. But having Jessie here anchored me somehow. That stormy place inside of me had been reduced to a drizzle.
Seeing my childhood home, where some of the most brutal fights between my parents occurred, really got to me.
And then when I saw that boy standing in that driveway, damn, that had unleashed a flurry of emotions. I imagined me at that age. How innocent and vulnerable I had been. I thought all dads got that angry and used their fists.
But it was so natural to be in that car with Jessie. She didn’t react or push me to talk. She just let me be. I had been so close to her and could’ve easily closed the distance between us. Call me crazy, but I think she might have let me. Instead, I stared into her eyes and nearly got lost in them. No way had I ever done that with a girl. I didn’t even stick around long enough to truly notice their eyes.
Jessie obviously guessed something was up, and I was okay with that. In fact, I almost told her. All of it. But the only person currently in my life who had figured some things out was Bennett, because he had a shit life growing up as well.
But I needed to avoid attachments, so there was no way I was going to confide in a girl. Maybe I could bend the rule though, since Jessie was a friend and this trip had solidified that maybe she was becoming a
good
friend. The problem was: I didn’t know how to compartmentalize my wild attraction to her. If I had kissed her, this trip would’ve taken a different turn, to something way more complicated.
I was emotionally raw right now so it