Free Zoe Thanatos by Crystal Cierlak Page B

applied what little makeup
she owned to her face. The grooming made a subtle change and put back some of
the color she’d lost. She took her time with each garment as though she was observing
a ritual. When she finished she felt taller and more confident. When she looked
at her reflection again she still didn’t truly recognize herself, but felt she
came a little bit closer to the Zoe of the past. Fake it until you make it ,
she chanted to herself.
     Upon returning to the living room
she noticed that it was as empty and neglected as the backyard. She scanned
around the modestly decorated home and made mental notes of changes she could
make, the life she could bring back into the empty spaces. She could vacate the
emptiness and fill it with something that would grow with her over time. If she
could remodel herself she could certainly remodel her home.
    After a quick stop at a donation
center, Zoe drove to the nearest home improvement store, the kind with an
enormous lot of construction equipment at one end and a gardening center on the
other. Employees in brightly colored smocks were milling about, leading people
down aisles filled with tools, light bulbs, paint and lumber. She stared up at
the aisle markers, hoping for a sign that would lead her to the right place to
start.
    An associate with a friendly
disposition approached her with a smile. “Are you finding everything you need?”
he asked politely.
    “I’m not really sure what I need,”
she answered. He seemed nonplussed. Maybe people often came in looking lost and
feeling out of their league?
    “Okay. Any particular project or
part of your home that needs fixing or that you’re looking to do some work on?”
    She pictured her backyard, the
state of disarray it had devolved into, and figured that was as good a place as
any to start. She liked the idea of dining outside like at the restaurant in
Ventura, eating meatloaf sandwiches beneath the sunset. She wanted to recreate
that, along with the twinkling lights of Paris and Sydney.
    “What can you show me in outdoor
dining?”
    It was at least two hours before
she saw the parking lot again. As luck would have it, Richard, the associate
who offered her help, was a design student and had some very inspired ideas for
transforming Zoe’s backyard into a beautiful outdoor living space. With his
considerable guidance she bought furniture and cookware to create an outdoor
dining area, sumptuous lounge chairs for beside the pool, lights that would sparkle
against the setting Santa Barbara sky, and enough plants and flowers to start
her own botanical garden. Every idea inspired her and she left with purpose,
feeling even better than she had that morning.
    Her stomach growled loudly as she climbed
back into her car. She hadn’t eaten since the night before and the macarons did
little to provide adequate nutrition. She set the car in motion and found
herself on Carrillo Street, heading not towards a restaurant, but to the Canary
Hotel.
     
     
    “Do you want to sit inside or
outside?” she asked.  The parking lot was only half full which meant that the
beach wasn’t too crowded and they were in between crowds at the restaurant. The
swelling afternoon was beautiful and full of promise.
    Evan shrugged nonchalantly, a smile
hugging his cheeks. “Whichever you prefer,” he accommodated.
    “Inside it is.” The Boathouse
looked like nothing more than a great shack on the beach, but was anything but
haggard. Inside it was contemporary with bright natural lighting, a great blue
couch that wrapped around a wall with enormous glass windows looking out on a
small strip of sand and the expanse of the Pacific, the Channel Islands
languishing out in the distance. An outside deck accommodated more than a dozen
tables, while a wall of half-cement, half-glass shielded guests from wind and
sand.
    Two young girls stood at a podium
at the entrance to the outside dining area, one giving directions on the phone
while the second greeted