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since you picked up that phone, even before I came over here. I think your boss would be interested in how you spend company time."
         "All right, I'll get off the phone."
         "Gee, thanks for the favor."
         By the time she finished the sale, Ryan must have heard the all-clear whistle and made his way out of ladies dresses and back to the register.
         "All ready?" he asked.
         "All done. But I have one thing I want to buy at that lingerie store in the mall."
         "My favorite place," he said.
         I wanted to buy a new nightgown to leave at Ryan's, although I would take it home first and wash it. The ones I buy at Wal-Mart are fine for home, but I like something special for Ryan's place.
         Ryan and I have this deal. If I wear pajamas, I have to take off the bottoms when I get into bed, so it is easier if I just wear nightgowns.  I like them long and flannel; Ryan likes them short and made out of anything.  I also like them on the big side, with extra room so they are easier to take off in the middle of the night when I get my hot spells.  So while I could wear a medium, I always buy them extra-large. 
         When we got to the store, I asked the clerk to show me where the extra-large long flannel nightgowns were located.
         She looked at me. "Buying something for a gift?"
         "No, just for me."
         "Dear, you don't wear an extra-large. Let me show you what we have in small."
         "No, I'd like to see extra-large please."
         "But that would be too big. Here, let me show you."
         She picked up a lacy satin nightgown so short that it wouldn't cover my navel, and so small it probably wouldn't fit over my head. Why does this always happen to me?
         "That's not for me. Please. Long, flannel, extra-large. Maybe there's someone else who can help me?" 
         "That's fine. Here, follow me."
         We walked over an aisle and she showed me this lacy satin gown in extra-large.
         The store was tightly packed with merchandise, and I was starting to feel very hot and closed in. I knew that I had very limited time before I had to run out and throw myself in the water fountain. I could feel the sweat on the back of my neck and my clothes starting to stick to me. The poor salesperson just happened to get dumb at the wrong time.
         "Can you tell me what words you have trouble understanding?" I asked her. "Now that you learned extra and large, is the word flannel not in your vocabulary?"  Here was proof that evolution can go in reverse.
         By this time, Ryan must have tired at looking at the pictures of girls in lingerie that were hanging around the place, because I saw him wander out of the store into the mall.
         She said, "There's no reason to get snippy."
         "I'm not snippy," I snipped. "I just wish you would show me what I want to buy, not what you want to sell me. I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter."
         She showed me a few things, I hated them all, and walked out of the store after a polite "Thank you."
         "Can we go?" I asked Ryan when I finally found him looking in the window of a bookstore. "And can you turn on the air conditioner on the way back?"
         I left for home before dinner, letting Ryan fend for himself. I wanted to get home before it got dark – I don't like driving at night – and I wanted time to mentally prepare myself for Monday morning.  I drove half of the way home with the back windows open and the air conditioner on. At one point I pulled over to the side of the road and just held my face against the cold window.

Chapter 8
         Monday went fine, sort of.
         I had a great time with Ryan during the weekend. The deepest part of my lower body was still feeling the aftershocks, so I wore my Love One earrings: one is a tennis racket, the other a tennis ball. I'm not into tennis, I just love the name of the earrings, and the color and