Free Lucifer's Daughter by Eve Langlais

today before going to work. I"d hate for him to think I couldn"t cook and sucked as a housekeeper, even if it happened to be the truth. I had other skills.
    “Can I offer you guys something to drink?” I asked. I didn"t wait for an answer as I took off my coat and threw it on a chair before walking into my tiny kitchen. I opened the fridge and grabbed a couple of cold beers–recent events called for alcoholic sustenance. In the drawer with the bottle opener, I eyed an array of emergency tools–I kept them stashed all over the place as a „just in case." I palmed my silver needles–deadly and decorative–and used them to fix my hair up into a loose bun on top of my head. Contrary to popular films, long hair flinging about in a fight was never a good idea.
    I carried the beers out to the boys, who swigged them with thanks. Downing a good portion of my own, I wandered into my bedroom to arm myself with a few more toys. Opening the hidden compartment in my headboard, I pulled out my braided unicorn hair whip, and placed it on the nightstand. It burned demons and other nasties better than holy water. It also reassured me that while I might be a lot of things, demon wasn"t one of them--the whip didn"t hurt me. I also added a few more daggers about my person. I might have magic, but only an idiot went out armed with only one weapon.
    Coming back out to my living room, I found Auric and Charon staring at each other; at least, I assumed Charon was staring. It was hard to tell with his hood and all.
    I flopped into my chair and took another swallow of my beer before talking. “Okay, Charon, spill.”
    Charon jerked his hood at Auric.

    “I"m not leaving, so say what you need to Muriel.” Auric looked like an immovable wall–and a stubborn ass. Both traits I happened to admire, as I held an abundance of those qualities myself.
    “It"s okay, Charon; I"m pretty sure he can be trusted.”
    Auric looked offended by my remark, but hey, I"d only known him all of, like, three days. He hadn"t had time to earn my full trust–or my heart–yet.
    “Have you heard about the movement to overthrow Lucifer?” asked Charon.
    “When isn"t there a movement to overthrow him?” Seriously, it had been happening since the beginning of time, or so I"d been told.
    “Well, this time, whoever is attempting it has managed to pull together some real muscle.”
    “Who is it?” And why hadn"t my father told me?
    Charon shook his hood. “That"s just it, we don"t know. There shouldn"t be anyone strong enough to attempt it. Your father has always been very careful about that.”
    “Speaking of whom, why did Dad send you, instead of coming himself?”
    “Yes, well, there was an incident that temporarily incapacitated him.”
    I jumped up from chair. “What?”
    “Your father"s okay,” Charon hastened to assure me. “But he had to take care of this little problem, so he asked me to come check on you and warn you. He wanted to send a guard or two, but he knows how much you hate that. To be honest, they kind of have their hands busy right now.”
    “I should go to him,” I said. Daddy needed me.
    “No!” Charon almost shouted; unusual for this usually mild mannered man–er, thing, or whatever Charon hid beneath the robe. “Your father wanted you to promise that you wouldn"t go to Hell. Promise me, Muriel.”
    “Fine.” I slouched back down into my chair, sulking. Figured Dad would still treat me like a little girl. “So what am I supposed to do instead?”
    “Stay safe. Your father will come speak to you when he can. Oh, and he had another message for me that didn"t make much sense.”
    “What was it?”
    “He said you were so grounded.”

    I laughed. When Auric looked at me, puzzled, and Charon cocked his head, I howled even harder, „til tears streamed down my cheeks.
    “I don"t suppose you"ll share with us what"s so funny?” asked Auric.
    I tried to stifle my laughter, not an easy task. I"d always had an odd sense of humor.