Free All That Matters by Yolanda Olson

In the Beginning...
    I used to be Amity Crane.
    I used to be successful, strong, beautiful, loved. I used to be the girl who would make guys pant when I walked by them, the girl that took the world by storm, and the girl that loved a good adventure more than anything else. I was the girl obsessed with superhero movies and devoured all the books I could get my hands on.
    I used to be a lot of things until three years ago when I got hooked on drugs and became a nympho. I don’t really know why I did it. I think boredom played a huge factor in my downfall. I was home alone a lot since my boyfriend started traveling a lot for business.
    My beauty went away, my success took a shit overnight, and the man that loved me more than he loved himself left me because of my infidelities.
    Distraught at what I had become, I turned into a pimp-less whore. I saved enough money to get a small apartment and I got myself clean. I slowly started to rebuild myself and I almost had everything I lost with the exception of Theo. He never did forgive me, but it made me stronger than ever and I would like to think that’s the reason I’ve survived as long as I have now.
    See, I had decided that since Theo couldn’t love me anymore and I knew I’d never be able to forgive myself for what I did to him, I left. A year after I got back on my feet, I had saved enough money to do a little globe hopping. Not too many places, but I figured the ones that were closest in proximity would be the places I would go to. Then, I told myself, when I got back from my international adventure I would find a job and keep attending my voluntary rehab sessions. Maybe I could find someone that was just like me and help them. Maybe that would get my mind off of losing the greatest love I knew I would ever have.
    It was when touring The Palace of the Grand Masters in Malta that I decided would go home after I visited Camogli and find Theo. I’d tell him everything that I hated about myself for doing what I did to him. I would tell him that he deserved better, he deserved someone who would love him and never stray, and he deserved to be happy. I’d confess that I knew I would never be worth what I was when I was with him. Money, even though I had a lot of it before my mental breakdown, was of no consequence to me anymore. Cars, property, houses; none of it would matter to me anymore because I couldn’t share it with him. My final confession would be that I would never feel happiness or worth again. Theo Lennox would always hold a place in my heart and I knew I would always hold a place in his. I could only hope that he would believe me.
    When I left The Palace, I went to the last place on my stop. Camogli had been on the top of my list since I left America because I wanted see the beautiful and colorful homes on the hills and possibly see the Christ of the Abyss statue in the harbor of San Fruttuoso.
    But I never made it home.
    After I had surfaced from my dive the world turned against me. At least that’s how it seemed. The family, who had been gracious enough to allow me to rent a room in their home, had my belongings tossed out into the street. No amount of knocking could get them to answer the door and so I grabbed my bags and left.
    I remembered being confused, wondering what I had done to be tossed out onto the street, as I made my way through the colorful fishing town trying to find a hostel to stay in.
    I remember laying my head down on the limp pillow in the dark little room on the uncomfortable and stiff bed. I remember falling asleep to the sound of whispered voices and I remember holding onto my bag as tightly as I could.
    I remembered being afraid, but nothing could prepare me for what true fear was. Nothing could prepare me for waking up in an unfamiliar place and being told by someone I didn’t know that he had purchased me and that I was now his property.
    I didn’t recognize his accent so I knew I was no longer in Italy. I didn’t recognize the city