the concrete floor, I stagger out to the sounds of ‘ Animal’ by Chase Holfelder. The deep chords and dark lyrics reminding me all too much that Stealth is taking a bite of my heart every time we do this dance. Although, we’ve never kissed before, let alone nearly had sex, it’s always just been major flirting with him wanting to kiss me but always backing away. I thought I could handle that, and I have been, but when he kissed me something inside me sparked. I thought this was it, he was finally giving himself over to me. Letting go of his demons and letting me in, but I was wrong, oh so wrong. Now, I’m left here feeling like I’m not good enough and that things with us will be strange.
Moving over to the bean bag sofa that Steel loved so much, I take a seat and huff folding my arms over my chest as I stare into my lap. I don’t want to go to bed just yet, that will only remind me of what I could be doing right now with Stealth, and I don’t want to be thinking of that right now. As I take a deep breath, a pair of killer Louis Vuitton sequin-embroidered satin from red to black heels appear at my feet. If there is one thing I know, it’s shoes. But these are to die for, and could only belong to one woman.
“Hey, Jess.”
“You turning into a horse or something?” she asks.
I glance up at her furrowing my brows wondering what the hell that means. “Umm… what?”
“Why the long face, honey?” she asks turning and sitting down next to me with a slight smirk like she thinks she made the best joke ever.
Sighing, I shake my head. “No, it’s nothing really.”
She huffs and rolls her eyes. “Ah-huh. Wouldn’t have something to do with that hunk of a man dragging you off to his room… giant boner and all… and now you’re out here not five minutes later?”
Slumping my body into the sofa, I nod. “I like Stealth, I really do. But I don’t think he’s attracted to me or something.”
Jess scoffs and rolls her eyes. “You’re dreaming! I see the way he stares at you when he thinks no one’s looking. He likes you, and wants you. He just has issues. There’s a lot more to Stealth that we don’t know. He’s hiding something, of that I am sure, I just don’t know what. Be careful with him, but follow your heart. If you like him, tell him. Lay it all on the line, and just let him know that you’re there for him.”
“It’s complicated… he’s getting over his ex-wife.”
Jess shakes her head and wraps her arm around my shoulders. “His wife won’t take him back. You need to show him that you’re better, and you’re here and willing. Once he sees the real you, and that you’re willing to go all in with him, how could he resist?”
Turning my lips to the side, I shrug. “I suppose.”
Jess pulls me to her and squeezes tightly. “Hey, why don’t you go back into his room now and show him that you care about him. You don’t have to fuck Stealth, just be with him. Let him hold you, tell him you’re there for him. Be there for him until he’s ready to give himself to you.”
Nodding and smiling, my stomach unknots itself and my heart starts to flutter back to a normal rhythm. “That’s a great idea.” I lean in kissing Jess on the cheek and she nods.
“I know, I came up with it.”
Laughing, I stand up to take a deep breath while straightening out my skirt ready to head back to Stealth’s room. Not knowing what I’ll find when I get there, I don’t want to go to bed tonight leaving things the way they are. It’s eating me up, and I’m sure he feels just as off about it as I do. Putting one foot in front of the other, I trek back down toward Stealth’s room. My heart is beating frantically as I gnaw on my bottom lip. I just hope he doesn’t send me away because that would hurt even more. Reaching his door, I take a deep breath and knock twice gently.
“Come in,” his deep deflated voice murmurs from behind the door.
I centre myself, then turn the door handle