Free The Things We Knew by Catherine West

was.
    “It’s the end of my world.” He didn’t have to spell it out for her. She’d been working for him long enough to know how bad he wanted this. How hard he’d worked.
    And how badly he’d screwed up.
    “Is this it? It’s all over, just like that?” He sat up, glad her eyes were hidden behind sunglasses.
    “For now.” She nodded, pushed her dark hair behind her ears, her mouth pinched. “Neil isn’t dropping you. He just wants to be sure you really want this. But if you do, Gray, you need to make some major changes. It’s fine playing in smoky bars and small stages, but if you want more than that, you’re going to have to prove it.”
    “I know. I will.” But he didn’t have a clue how.
    A huge Canadian flag flapped in the wind atop a building hidden by tall pines. Gray studied the overly large red maple leaf. Maybe he could just move here and start over. It might actually be worth considering if the country wasn’t so cold. He put his cup down and pushed his trembling hands under his legs.
    “Your sister called earlier. I told her you’d call her back.”
    Gray ground out a curse and scuffed his boots on the grass. “I don’t want to talk to Liz.” Their last conversation had escalated into a shouting match, after she’d suggested rehab . . . again. Like Liz’s life was so perfect, living with that creepo boyfriend of hers. Gray suspected the guy was abusive. Couldn’t prove it, and of course Liz would never confide in him. Or anyone.
    “Not Liz. It was Lynette.” Victoria stood and fished his cell out of her coat pocket. He was always leaving it somewhere. “I’m going inside. We’re almost packed. But I guess now you need to let me know where we’re going.”
    Gray nodded and took the phone. “Thanks.” Another harsh cough overtook him, and he watched concern mar her expression.
    Perhaps Liz had a point. Maybe it was time to give up the game he’d been playing the last few years, trying to convince them all that he was fine. That he wasn’t falling apart.
    He didn’t even buy his own lies anymore.
    His throat closed, his chest tight again. Gray couldn’t remember when he’d last fallen asleep on his own. When he’d slept through the night without having to rush to the bathroom or remedy the urgent craving that robbed him of slumber and sent him back to the dark places he was desperate to avoid.
    But maybe, just maybe, it was possible to start again.
    He rubbed his nose and managed to look at Victoria. “A rehab center might be a good first stop?”
    Tori took off her shades and wiped her eyes, reached for his hand, and held it a minute. Then she nodded and hid her eyes again. “Don’t stay out here too long. It’s ridiculously cold.”
    He waited until she was well out of sight before giving in to the wave of emotion that crested, crashed through him, and took his breath away. It wasn’t like he tried to screw up. He was just really, really good at it.
    Gray focused on the screen of his phone and dialed the familiar number. Didn’t bother to check his watch, couldn’t remember if there was a time difference anyway. The corners of his mouth lifted when he heard his baby sister’s voice.
    “Hey, Shortstop.” He heard the dogs barking in the background, and Lynette shushed them. If he tried real hard, he could probably hear the ocean.
    “Gray!” She pretty much screamed his name and he grinned.
    “Yeah, it’s me. Going deaf here, sweetheart.”
    “I’ve been trying to reach you for weeks.” And clearly not thrilled that she hadn’t been able to.
    “Yeah. Sorry about that. I’ve been a little . . .” Strung out. “Busy.”
    “Well, never mind. It’s so good to hear your voice. How are you? How is everything? Everyone keeps asking when you’re coming out with a new album. Where are you now?”
    Gray smiled. Sweet Lynnie. Always so quick to forgive and forget. Would she forgive him his sins this time, if she knew them?
    “Montreal. Things are good. Just