Free Spark by Jennifer Ryder Page B

defined abs. Jon takes my hand to his mouth, and kisses my knuckles. He closes his eyes, and takes in a deep breath. When they open they glisten, traced with sadness.
    “You need to slow down, Eevie …”
    “Okay. Is that what you want?” I search Jon’s face for an insight. Why?
    “Um, no, it’s just … some things are out of my control.” He sighs. Jon’s cheeks flush a deep red. I don’t understand.
    “What things?”
    Jon sits up, and runs his hands through his hair. He won’t even look at me.
    “Jon, tell me,” I demand, grabbing his chin so he’s forced to lock his eyes with mine. My brain struggles to think of what’s got him in this state.
    “I’ve been undergoing treatment for the last couple of years for …”
    “Oh my God, what is it?” I blurt out. Please not cancer.
    “I dealt with it for years before I did anything about it … but I’m hoping with a new form of treatment, things might improve.”

CHAPTER FIVE

    “What are you being treated for?” I ask, searching his face. He can barely hold my eye.
    “Premature ejaculation.” As he says the words, it’s like they leave a bad taste in his mouth. Poor Jon. It sounds so clinical. “I’ve tried a few things without success. Apparently it’s common for guys to, you know, come quick the first few times they get intimate, and then have no problems after that, but I guess I haven’t been so lucky.”
    My heart sinks heavily in my chest. No wonder he’s kept a low profile all these years. I’ve always seen him as confident, but shy when it came to girls. It explains why he’d never put himself out there. It tugs at my heart knowing that he’s been dealing with this for so long without anyone to talk to besides his doctor. I wish he’d said something sooner, but then again, it’s a tough conversation to have. I can understand why he left it until now to tell me.
    “I’m sorry, Jon,” I say softly. I place my hand on his arm, and rub it in a comforting gesture. “You know, this whole sex thing is new to me too.” I hope I don’t have to say the V word .
    “Yeah, I know,” he says, and nods. He brushes the hair from my face, and traces along my jaw with his finger. “Believe me, it’s on my mind.”
    “I’m sorry if I went too far.”
    He sighs. “Don’t be.” He looks away, and focuses on the bedroom door. An uncomfortable silence fills the room, as he stares ahead.
    “So, what’s this new treatment?” I ask.
    “The latest approach the doctor wants to try is injection therapy, but I fucking hate needles.” It must be serious, then.
    “Yeah, I hate them too. So, are you supposed to jab yourself in the arm or the leg?”
    He looks into my eyes and slowly shakes his head. “Nope.” Jon cringes.
    “Where then?”
    Jon glimpses at his crutch, and back at me. Shit—there.
    “Oh.” I shudder at the thought.
    “Not only is it expensive, but you can’t do it too often as it can bruise, and have some nasty side-effects. There’s no guarantee, either, that it will work.”
    “Oh.” I don’t know what else to say.
    Jon gets out of bed, and pulls on a T-shirt. “Can you get me one too, please?” I ask. Being practically naked now seems wrong. He passes me one, and I slip it on and snuggle under the covers with him, spooning against his back. I try not to touch him anywhere that may excite him. It may take me a while to work out where that is.
    “I’m glad you told me,” I say, and softly kiss the nape of his neck. What else can I say? I have to be so delicate for fear of crushing him. It must have been so hard for him to tell me, but I don’t want to promise him anything. I’m still working out how I feel; if I can love him, more than I do as my best friend. I won’t lie. Jon’s problem has definitely thrown a spanner in the works. One giant mother-fucking spanner.
    “Night, Eevie.” He turns and kisses me on the forehead, and rolls back.
    “Night.”
    Within minutes, his breathing is heavier, and his