Free For Everyone Concerned by Damien Wilkins

uncle back home. Maybe it would occur in a big hangar somewhere. And the Prime Minister would speak and there’d be tears, soldiers’ tears. I thought of saying this to Alamein but she was showing me the paper again.
    Seen this? she said.
    I nodded.
    Bit pricey, said Alamein. Been another bad season.
    Then one of the IT guys from the seventh floor walked past carrying a paper bag with the logo of the new place on it. What’s in the bag? said Alamein.
    Fish fingers, he said.
    Fish fingers? I said. You can get them there?
    Sure, he said. They do them for you if you ask.
    Oh, I love fish fingers, said Alamein. I put them in for the kids and I always eat a couple. Can’t resist.
    You think? I said.
    Yeah! said Alamein. What’s wrong with them?
    Fish fingers? I said.
    What’s your problem?
    Nothing, I said. But what’s in them, is my question.
    What’s in them? said the IT guy. He pulled one out and bit on it.
    I said, What I heard is they sweep up the floor at the end of each day and that’s what’s in them.
    Believe that? said Alamein.
    I don’t know, I said.
    That’s just some story.
    Read the thing on the box, I said. Even what they admit to putting in them. They’re not that healthy.
    Whack some T sauce on them, they’re all right! said Alamein.
    I looked at the telephones, praying for a call, something. World on Brink. I didn’t want to fight with my friend. She’d been a great friend to me.
    All that sugar and salt, I said.
    Yeah, I’m sure they’ll put me in prison soon.
    The IT guy was standing in front of us, eating.
    Well what’s in them? said Alamein accusingly to the IT guy. If we’re going to the horse’s mouth, which is what you are.
    He was chewing, smiling. What’s in them? he said.
    Exactly, said Alamein. We’re waiting here.
    Comfort, he said. That’s what’s in them. And as he walked off, he gave us a little salute with his fish finger. Good natured? Who knew? IT was a different world naturally.
    Alamein turned away from me. She took two lollipops from the jar and put them in her bag. She had a couple of kids in after-school care.
    Suddenly I knew what I had to do. Obvious. I had to get the oysters for us. I had to walk across the road and get the oysters. Of course they were pricey but it’d be worth it. A day like today, it’d be worth it.
    Then we both got calls, bang, at the same time. We spoke into our headsets in those strange voices we’d been trained in. Good morning, I said, though maybe it was already afternoon.

wife is short
    It was my parents’ wedding anniversary. Forty years. I rang to say that I’d take them out to a restaurant. Mum said that wasn’t necessary. Anyway your father doesn’t like to go out, she said. He always complains he can’t get enough to eat.
    Then we’ll order a lot of food, I said, and if he’s still hungry we’ll order more. He won’t be able to stand up after this meal.
    It sounds terrible, she said, but if you’re going, then we’ll go.
    At the restaurant Dad tucked his serviette into his shirt. Mum took it out of his shirt and put it on his lap.
    Dad looked at the menu for a long time. He turned it over and turned it back. The steak is right there,Mum said. He always goes for the steak, she told me. She would go for the chicken. I always go for the chicken, she said.
    Though Mum said it was a waste of money, I ordered a bottle of wine and we raised our glasses. To forty years, I said.
    It doesn’t seem like forty years, said Dad. He picked up his fork and looked at it.
    I remember when we lived in our little flat, said Dad, brighter suddenly.
    I remember the walls, said Mum, like paper. Are we thinking of the same place?
    This was when we were first married, Dad said, and your mother worked in the fish place. She was their best filleter. She used to bring us back fish, cheap.
    I didn’t know about this, I said.
    I wasn’t their best, said Mum. Maybe second. You get tired of fish. It wasn’t a treat to have a nice piece of