Free The Empire of Ice Cream by Jeffrey Ford

two drawers of the hutch before I found the board and pieces. It struck me as odd that he didn’t keep them in a box or a bag or something, but the entire board was set up inside the drawer. It took only a second to swipe every one of them up and toss them in the pillowcase. I didn’t bother with the board.
    â€œI was just going to tell the others, ‘Let’s get out of here,’ when Desnia reached up and pulled the tape off his mouth. Cho-cho tried to lean over and stop him, but the old man drove his fist straight up, connected with Cho-cho under the chin, and sent him sprawling backward into the corner of the room where he knocked over a lamp and fell on his back.
    â€œWith his other hand, the old man flung something at Wolfe that moved through the air so fast I could hardly see it. A split second later, Mike had his hand to the side of his head and there was a sharp piece of metal sticking out of it, blood running down across his face. He went over like a ton of shit. Me and Mars were in shock, neither of us moving, when Desnia flung off the blanket and pulled out this big fucking sword. I’m not shitting you, this sword was like something out of a movie. Then he leaped out of the chair. That’s when Johnny decided it was time to book. Too late, though; the old guy jumped forward into a crouch, swung that sword around, and took a slice out of Mars’s leg like you wouldn’t believe. I mean the blood just sort of fell out all over the place and from the lower thigh down was hanging on by a piece of gristle. He hit the deck and started howling like a banshee.
    â€œDesnia wasn’t done yet, though. Following the slash on Johnny, he twirled around toward me like a goddamn dancer, and swung the sword again. Luckily, I had the crowbar and held it up in front of me at the last second. It deflected the blow but the blade still cut me on the left side of my chest. I don’t know where it came from, just an automatic reaction, but I swung the crowbar and took him out at the ankles. As he went down, I looked up and saw Cho-cho crawling out through an open window. I dropped the crowbar, grabbed the pillowcase tight, ran across the room, and dove headfirst right behind him.
    â€œMan, I wasn’t even on my feet before Desnia was sticking his bald head out the window, getting ready to leap through after us. We ran into the backyard, to a corner where there was a shed with a light over it, but there was that damn ten-foot fence. My first thought was to try to jump it, but forget it, Desnia was already there behind us. He would have just slashed our asses. We backed against the fence and got ready to brawl.
    â€œHe walked slowly up to us, with the blade at his side. In the light from over the shed, I could see he had lost his glasses, and I don’t know how he could have swung that sword the way he did, because his eyes weren’t just fucked up, he had none. No eyes, just two puckered little assholes in his head.
    â€œWhen Desnia was no more than three feet away, Cho-cho held up the crucifix that hung around his neck, like in a vampire movie, to protect himself. The old guy laughed without hardly a sound. Then he lifted the sword slowly, brought it to Cho-cho’s neck, and with a flick of the wrist just nicked him so he started to bleed. With that, Desnia dropped the sword and turned around. He took two steps away from us and his legs buckled. He went down like a sack of turnips. In the distance I could hear Johnny still screaming like mad, and above his racket the sound of the police siren. Cho-cho and I used the side of the shed to scrabble up over the fence, and we got away with the gold.
    â€œSounds crazy, right? The old man turning into fucking Zorro at the drop of a hat? But I’m telling you it was serious. The Martian died that night on the old man’s living room rug. The blade had sliced an artery and he bled out before the ambulance could get there. On top of