Free Tied Together by Z. B. Heller

upside down Ryan looked back down at me and grinned. The nylon fabric of his workout shorts brushed my hair, and I realized how close my head was to his crotch. I grasped onto the silver bar, adjusting my grip on the metal. My arms shook as I squeezed the bar in my hands. Determination, and possibly insanity, must have crossed over my face.
    Ryan put his hands on top of mine, the electricity igniting in my veins all over again. “Relax, Brandon. You’re going to hurt yourself.” He squeezed my hands before letting go. “When you’re ready, you can lift. I didn’t know how much weight you could take, so I started off easy. If you can take this much, I will push you harder.”
    “Got it.” I pushed upward on the bar, held it in the arm before bringing it down to my chest and then back up again. After fifteen reps, I felt the burn overtake my muscles and welcomed the pain.
    “Put more weight on,” I huffed as I set the bar back up to rest.
    “Are you sure? It looked like you were struggling a bit.”
    “Just put it on,” I snapped.
    “Okay. But I’m just going to put on a little.”
    Ryan walked back over to where the weights were, and I used that time to take a few deep breaths to calm myself while he restacked the bar.
    “I’m right at your back when you’re ready.”
    Those words didn’t help. I pulled the bar up again, lifting it from the hold position, and brought it to my chest. As soon as I went to raise it, a sharp pain tore down my right arm.
    “Ryan, my arm! Take it!” I screamed as my arms shook from fatigue.
    Ryan reacted quickly and took the bar from my hands. I sat up on the bench, nearly hitting my head on the bar. Slumping forward, I massaged my biceps where the muscle spasm continued. Ryan raced to my side and sat on the bench in between my legs.
    “I told you that you were pushing it too far. What’s going on in that head of yours?” He tapped on my temple with his finger.
    I wanted to scream that he was in my head and I couldn’t get him out! I couldn’t stop thinking of his lips, his arms, his smile… everything.
    “I’m just distracted. I have a massive exam and the instructor has a hard ass.”
    “Excuse me?” Ryan chuckled.
    “I meant he is a hard ass! Gets on everyone’s case if you don’t do the work.”
    I might as well have found a shovel and dug myself a hole.
    “Here, let me have it. I’ll see if I can knead the spasm out.” He took my arm in his large hands and slowly rubbed my aching muscles. I flinched with the pain. When the soreness ebbed, I lifted my eyes from his tactile hands. He was so close his intoxicating scent threatened to override my senses. A second later he looked up from my arm, meeting my gaze, but he didn’t stop rubbing my muscles. He was stoic, silent, but his eyes spoke a thousand words.
    “Does it feel better?”
    “No,” I replied. I wasn’t talking about my arm but the feeling I had brewing deep down in the pit of my stomach. At that moment, my resolve broke. I couldn’t stand another second without getting another taste of Ryan’s lips. That feeling had haunted me since the night of graduation. I used my free hand to cup his stubbled cheek. Concentrating on the feeling of his skin under mine, I brought his chin up and studied his face.
    Ryan’s eyes opened wide, the hazel in his irises disappearing as his pupils darkened under weight of my stare. His lips parted and he seemed to chew on his words before he said, “What are you doing?”
    “I… umm, sorry.” The minimal amount of confidence I thought I had vanished, and I dropped my hand and pulled out of his grasp. Looking away, I said, “I thought you had something on your cheek; I wanted to wipe it away.”
    Nice excuse. Real nice.
    “Brandon, it’s just that…” When I looked back, I was met with confusion and a grimace. My chest started to rip in two. “I think we need to talk—”
    “I’m looking forward to my date on Saturday,” I blurted out like an idiot.