Free The Perfect Host by Theodore Sturgeon

crash pri. Dr. Simmons raised his eyebrows at this, and never forgot it.
    “Hi, Muscles.”
    “Hello, Leroy. Listen. What’s with the salvage situation? I want to do that analysis.”
    “The stinkers!” the colonel said heatedly. “They made a proposition. I turned ’em down. The Board backed me up.”
    “What was the proposition?”
    “They wouldn’t send a sample. They said if we had someone who could perform a definitive analysis, to send him to Russia.”
    “Aha! Mountain to Mahomet, eh? Why did you refuse?”
    “Don’t be silly! There are maybe a half-dozen men in this country who might be able to make a really exhaustive analysis, and come up with a reliable conclusion. And about five of ’em, we can’t be sure.”
    “Send the other one, then.”
    “That’s you, egghead. We’re not going to run a risk like that.”
    “Why not?”
    “They could use you, Muscles.”
    “I couldn’t use anything they could give me.”
    “That isn’t the point,” the colonel assured him. “But they have ways—”
    “Knock off the dramatics, Leroy. This isn’t a grade-B movie. And there isn’t time for fooling around. We have maybe six weeks.”
    There was a silence. Then, “Only six weeks?”
    “That’s right,” said the doctor positively. “Tell you what. Make arrangements to get me to Minsk right away, and let me get on that analysis. At worst we can find out what the ship was made of, and get an idea of how advanced those people are. At the very best, we might find a defense. Tell the Russians that my work will be open and aboveboard. They can put on as many observers as they want to, and I will share my findings completely with them.”
    “You can’t do that! That’s just what we want to avoid!”
    It was the physicist’s turn to fall silent.
How do you like that!
he thought.
The Board is clinging to some faint hope that the invaders willdo their dirty work for them. They think that we’ll find a defense and no one else will
. He said finally, speaking slowly and carefully as if to a child, “Leroy, listen. I’m just as anxious as you are to do something about this matter. I think I can do something. But either I do it my way, or I don’t do it at all. Is that quite clear? Perhaps I’m more resigned than you are. Perhaps I think we deserve this … are you there?”
    “Yes.” The doctor knew his brother had paused to lick his lips nervously. “You really think you can get something of value out of the analysis?”
    “Almost certainly.”
    “I’ll check with the Board. Muscles—”
    “Yes, Leroy.”
    “Don’t go mystic on us, hah?”
    “Go see the Board,” said Dr. Simmons, and hung up.
    He went to Russia.
    The colonel met him on his return, two weeks later, at a West Coast field. The unarmed long-range jet fighter and its bristling escort, which had accompanied it from Eniwetok, skimmed to the landing strip. The colonel had a two-place coupé sport plane waiting. Dr. Simmons, inordinately cheerful, refused a meal and said he wanted to take off right away for his laboratories. The colonel wanted him to appear before the Board for a report, but he smiled and shook his head, and the colonel knew that smile better than to argue.
    When they reached traveling altitude, and the colonel had throttled down to stay under the sonic barrier, and they had the susurrus of driving jets to accompany them rather than the roar of climbing jets to compete, they talked.
    “How was it, Muscles?”
    “I had a ball. It was
fine
.”
    The colonel shot a look at him.
He disapproves
, thought the doctor.
War is grim and businesslike, and for anyone to enjoy the business of war seems to him a sacrilege
.
    “It looked pretty touchy at first. They all acted as if I had an A-bomb in my watch pocket. Then I ran into Iggy.”
    “Iggy?”
    “Yup. I could recite his whole name if I tried hard, but it’s a jawbreaker. We used to drink forbidden sherry together in the dorm at the University of Virginia when I