Free Monkey Business by Anna Wilson Page B

it, but he had assumed that Zed would bring Reggie round on his birthday and that
Mum would not be able to do anything about it, because the orang-utan would come with all the information from the charity about how mistreated he had been and that would mean Mum couldn’t be
cruel and send him back.
    But it was never going to work now. Mum was cross enough about Dyson and Colin and Hammer and the snails and the spiders and every other animal Felix had ever had anything to do with. She would
never say yes to Reggie. Except, she was still smiling . . .
    ‘Erm, but you’re not cross?’ Felix ventured.
    Mum laughed again. ‘Cross? How can I be cross? It’s funny, that’s all – and rather sweet.’
    ‘Sweet?’ Felix was puzzled. Was Mum starting to talk like Uncle Zed? Did she mean ‘sweet’ as in ‘it’s cool that you are getting an orang-utan’? Or did
she mean ‘sweet’ as in ‘it’s so cute’?
    ‘Yes,’ Mum went on, beaming. ‘It’s lovely that you and Flora play so imaginatively together. When I was your age I played “making house” or “cops and
robbers” or things like that. But coming up with the idea of having an imaginary orangutan – and opening your own zoo – it’s amazing!’
    Imaginary?
    Then Felix thought again about what Flo’s mum had said about ‘make-believe plans’ and everything fell into place. The mums thought this was all a game! Felix squirmed and
shuffled on his chair and drew pictures with his finger on the wipe-clean tablecloth. How was he going to explain this? What would Mum say when she found out that Reggie really
was
coming to
live with them? Would she make him cancel the adoption? And, if she did, what would happen to Reggie? Would he have to go back and live with the people who had raised him and made his life so
horrible? Felix felt a wall of tears back up behind his eyes and a rush of words push against his throat and before he could stop to think things through properly, he had blurted: ‘But
it’s
not
imaginary! The orang-utan really
is
coming to live with us. And he’s called Reggie. Zed found him on the Internet.’ And he went on to tell Mum all about
Zed’s promise to adopt him an animal for his birthday, and the research they had done on the WWF website.
    As Felix spoke, he saw the smile on Mum’s face fade away. Finally it had completely melted, leaving her with a distinctly stony expression.
    ‘Ah,’ she said. And then she said, ‘Is that exactly, word for word, what that crazy brother of mine has told you?’
    Felix gave a hard sniff to try and keep the tears at bay while he thought for a moment and then he said, ‘Well, no. Not exactly word for word. But he has said that it would be cool to
adopt me an orang-utan for my birthday. And when you adopt a child it comes to live in your house, doesn’t it? So obviously that is what is going to happen with Reggie – he is going to
come and live here. Otherwise what would be the point in doing the adoption thing?’
    Mum grimaced. ‘I think we need to get Zed over tonight to explain things,’ was all she would say.
    Unfortunately by the time Zed and Silver made it round, Mum had had a few more words to say on the topic of her ‘crazy brother’s ridiculous ideas’. The second
Zed walked through the door, Felix launched himself into the hallway at his uncle, throwing his arms round his legs. Colin had been sitting in the middle of the floor, watching a spider, so he
nearly got trampled on. He shrieked and streaked out of the front door, seconds before it closed, narrowly missing his tail.
    ‘Mum says Reggie won’t really come to live with us because that’s not what animal adoption means, and I didn’t believe her so she made me look it up on the Internet and
read all the tiny, small words about what happens when you pay your money, and it says that Reggie will stay in Africa and it’s just the charity that gets your money and all I get is the
letters, but
you
said he was