Free Sasha’s Dad by Geri Krotow Page B

there—and the only one without a baby in her near future. Seeing Dutch and Natalie’s baby had been excruciating. She’d thought back then that she simply didn’t relate to the whole baby thing, but today she realized it was more than that.
    She hadn’t wanted to see that Dutch and Natalie were truly happy together. That their love had created a tiny human being.
    “I don’t remember you, except from TV.”
    Ouch.
    “There’s no reason you would—you were a newborn when I first met you and, as I said, in school during that last visit. Your parents might not have even mentioned that I’d stopped by.”
    Claire would never admit it to Sasha, but she’d planned that trip for late morning, when she knew Dutch would be at work and Sasha in school. Natalie on her own she could handle.
    When it was just the two of them, she could pretend that their friendship had survived the years and Claire’s broken heart.
    Claire had never told Natalie about her sense of betrayal or her unrequited feelings for Dutch. Part of it was Claire’s unwillingness to hurt others. A bigger part of it was pride. She’d never told anyone that Dutch had broken her heart.
    Including Natalie.
    Claire knew she had to examine her resentment against Natalie. How could Natalie have sympathized with Claire if Claire hadn’t told her how hurt she was over her marriage to Dutch? And yet…Claire had come to understand that she bore some responsibility for what had happened. After high school she’d let her relationship with Dutch grow stale, diminish in importance. And she’d let her friendship with Natalie die away.
    “I loved your mom like a sister the entire time we were growing up. As adults our lives took different paths. Like I said, it wasn’t only me not coming home, your mom never made it into D.C., either.”
    In truth, Natalie had come to Georgetown once, before she got sick; and stayed with Claire overnight. Claire gave her a tour of the White House and Natalie sat through a press conference.
    After which Natalie, in true brute-honest Natalie fashion, had told Claire she needed to have more in her life than work.
    Claire had been a press corps reporter for two years already, and Natalie made it clear that she thought Claire had been ignoring her social life, that she lacked balance.
    Claire hadn’t wanted to hear Natalie’s opinion, no matter how sensible. But instead of arguing, she’d used it as an excuse to further distance herself from her friend. Natalie had assumed Claire was angry at her for what she had said, and Claire never corrected the assumption. She thought it was easier for both of them if she dropped the relationship.
    “I spoke to your dad after your mom’s last chemo.” The one they’d all prayed would allow her to pull through, protect her from the last stages of her disease. But it hadn’t.
    “I’m sorry, Sasha. I should’ve come back to see your mom, to meet you. I had every intention of coming. But I missed my chance by a week. I had an emergency trip with the president that my network needed me to cover.”
    And after that, it was too late. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, intrude on the family’s grief.
    “Dying, like having a baby, is intensely private. I didn’t want to take anything away from your mom’s time with you and your dad.”
    “Hmm.” Sasha’s ponytail swished as she nodded.
    Claire hoped “hmm” meant that Sasha’s inquisition was over.
    Claire picked up the wool she’d dropped and stuck the needles into the ball.
    “Would you like a refill on your hot chocolate? I’ve finished mine.”
    “I’m okay.” Sasha kept knitting and pulled her yarn from a beautiful silk yarn bag. No doubt it had been Natalie’s. Claire’s throat tightened and she turned her face away.
    She had no illusion of replacing Natalie in Sasha’s life. But she wanted to somehow make up for her own transgressions against Natalie. She hadn’t realized it was going to be this difficult. She hadn’t