Free No Perfect Secret by Jackie Weger

consignment. Tall and slender, Anna had been surprised and delighted to discover many of those wonderful clothes fit her without so much as a stitch of alterations. By the end of her year in France, she had added poise, cachet and bling, not only to her wardrobe —but her very essence. She was at the peak of her confidence when she met Kevin.
    Not only that —but good fortune followed wherever she went. The doctors who leased her house in Mission, Kansas begged to buy it. She sold it at a good price and put the money in CDs before interest dropped to non-existent. She stayed with her best friend from high school while waiting for the sale to close, and used that time to apply online for librarian positions to schools in D.C. and Maryland. The Library of Congress was the ultimate—she filled out that application, too, never expecting a reply. Her former professors told her that job would be impossible to get, but wrote her a fabulous reference anyway. On Craigslist she found an apartment near the Eastern Market—a pair of Georgetown students were looking to sublease while they did a couple of semesters at the London School of Economics. In four phone calls she had a fully-furnished apartment, a job interview at the Library of Congress, and two interviews lined up at schools in Maryland.
    Kevin met her at the airport when she returned to D.C. They fell into one another’s arms , and later into bed in her new apartment, with unrestrained passion. Life was so good it had a taste—the ambrosia of dark honey, ripe peaches, and vine-ripened melons—which she often bought at the Eastern Market. The market was only a short block from her apartment. When Kevin wasn’t working, they’d stroll the fragrant halls hand-in-hand, shopping for the ingredients for dishes she prepared to show off her newly-acquired cooking skills. There was never a day without laughter. After a third interview she was hired as a senate researcher. Two months later they were married by a Justice of the Peace, Clara-Alice their only witness.
    Anna closed her eyes, yet the sun penetrated her lids with prisms of the color wheel. Where had the laughter gone? Why didn’t she have the child she longed for? When had Kevin stopped loving her? She was two months past her thirty-fourth birthday. She wished her mother were alive to tell her what to do.
    Her mother. Anna sat up with a jolt. Once, not long after Dad had died, Anna heard her mother in the kitchen —first giggling, then a snort of laughter, then a series of guffaws that seemed to bounce off the walls. Anna hadn’t laughed since her Dad’s funeral. In the kitchen she found her mother wiping tears with a dish cloth. Anna looked at her. “Momma! How can you be laughing when Daddy’s dead?”
    “I was just remembering something funny that happened when your Dad and I were dating. We were in the park. Getting all set up for our first kiss, our lips weren’t this far apart —” She held up her thumb and forefinger, displaying two inches. Bird poop came right down out of the sky between us and landed on his shoulder.”
    “Ugh. I don’t think that’s funny.”
    Her mother smiled. “I guess you had to be there.” Anna’s face was tense and unhappy. “Oh, sweetie, listen. You can’t let laughter go out of your life—no matter how many bad things happen. I wish you’d known my grandmother. Grampa died in WWI and she lost two sons to WWII. Yet, she was the happiest woman I’ve ever known. She said God lined our souls with laughter so a person would know that no matter how dark the night, the sun was coming up on a new day. We’re each of us responsible for our own happiness, Anna—it’s not something you can put off on another person.”
    Anna sat on the edge of the wicker chair thinking: That’s what I’ve done. I wait to see what kind of mood Kevin is in before I let the tension go out of me. I listen to Clara-Alice’s list of complaints and fears, and allow myself to sink below the