Free Still Water by A. M. Johnson Page B

she felt I needed to do this on my own. I was pissed at first, she was always there for me when it came to Liz and my stupid ass drama, but in the end, as usual, she was always right.
    We were sitting in the living room by the fire. Sailor was fast asleep in her crib holding tight to her new pink stuffed penguin. Success. We caught up on the past year. Sawyer's business was doing well. Elizabeth was finishing up her senior year and would graduate in December. It was like I had never left, but at the same time everything was different. Elizabeth couldn't get over my fully tattooed upper body. She loved ink. That was part of the reason I'd gotten so much work done. I thought one day I could be the person she needed. I knew now I was so wrong.
    "I just can't believe it. The artwork is so vibrant. I loved seeing Sailor in your arms. There is just something about babies in tattooed arms, I think." She smiled up at Sawyer teasingly. "I think you need sleeves, sir. You have that full back piece, now it's time for your arms." She giggled.
    "We'll see, Cricket." Sawyer leaned down and kissed Elizabeth on the cheek. They both smiled so warmly at each other. It was good to see them both happy. They'd been through so much. Once they had been together for a while, it had come to light that Sawyer's dad, Gavin Bryant, whom he hadn't spoken to for years, had murdered a young girl. Sawyer's mother had gone to confront his father one night, and he had killed her. Gavin was twisted, and I knew that he hurt Sawyer more than he'd ever wanted to share. He set a trap for Sawyer, but Elizabeth went instead. Long story short, Elizabeth got shot and almost died. Worst week of my damn life.
    Needless to say, seeing them happy now made me feel better, and that's something I hadn't felt in forever it seemed. "Why did you go so dark on the one side and so light on the other?" Elizabeth's eyes met mine. "I mean the one side is so lovely — bright sun, beautiful flowers… it's all so gorgeous, really. That tribal is so intricate, but then your left side is so macabre. I mean bleeding hearts are supposed to be pink, not black." She shook her head.
    "That's the point, baby girl. Good versus evil and all that shit." I honestly believed that. I felt for so long that I was worthless, not good enough, and I sort of lost my way. I had light and darkness. I wanted to be that guy — the one who gets the girl, the kids, the dog, and the Goddamn picket fence. But… I knew better. The darker parts of my heart always seemed to win in the end. I couldn't make a good choice if I wanted to, and, because I was so mixed up over Liz for so long, I lost my self-worth. Now that I was free of that heartache, maybe… just maybe, I could find myself again.
     

CHAPTER THIRTEEN
    Lily
     
    I WAS SWEATING BULLETS. T HIS WAS the worst idea ever. Jace's hands on my inner thighs had me feeling on edge. He had adjusted the climbing harness at least three times. At this point, I was sure he was just trying to cop a feel. "All right, I'm done. I hate this," I blurted out.
    "Already, we've only been at it for like thirty minutes, Lil." Jace's voice held some incredulity.
    "Yeah." I started to unbuckle myself.
    "Let me—"
    "No way, buddy, hands to yourself," I said with a bit more severity than was necessary.
    "O… kay." Jace drew out the word like he was talking to a small child. He was such an ass. I didn't know what I was thinking going on a date with him. Dinner was a joke; the whole time all he did was talk about himself. How he was so good at everything he did. Barf. He was winking at me so much that I started to think he had something in his eye, but then I realized, nope, he's just a conceited asshole. Not to mention the fact that the entire time I was with him, all I could think about was Todd. Jace couldn't stop talking about Todd either. He told me horrible stories about Todd and how his "reputation" was epic. It made me physically ill listening to all the tales of Todd's