Free Gilded Lily by Pauline Allan

their partners.
    Adam questioned whether it was a good idea to get involved with the woman his brother may have been dating. Then a flash of Lily’s smile when she’d picked him up at the airport filtered through his mind. He did say they were just friends.
    The salad was almost done when he started cutting the loaf of fresh bread. The hearty aroma made his stomach growl. Ellen had always done the cooking when they were together. She said he undercooked the pasta and put too many tomatoes in the marinara. Adam finally gave up and tasted the bland cuisine his fiancée insisted they eat. Choices were limited back then. The choice to get on the plane for Bosnia—that was a duty, Adam thought. The choice to expose the war in real time—that was a duty to the soldiers. The choice to marry Ellen—that was a godforsaken duty to his father. And the choice to walk away from the Catholic-wedding plans—well, that was his choice for a life without judgment.
    Adam forced the image of Ellen out of his mind and replaced it with the picture of Lily sitting on the porch swing, mug of coffee resting in her hand, and him walking up to give her a good-morning kiss. Now that was a choice he’d savor every time.
     
    LILY CARRIED HER grandmother’s heavy glass dish toward the stable house. The quick, stolen moments she was taking to gather her nerves weren’t working. The sunset cast a thousand shadows through the trees as she walked down the path, absorbing the coolness of the cobblestones through the bottoms of her bare feet.
    “Let the sensation calm you,” she continued to repeat. She’d draped a thin sweater over her forearm before leaving the house. The spring nights seemed to cool as fast as the afternoons heated up, and she didn’t know how late he’d want her to stay.
    As she approached the path leading to the pond, she looked over, remembering how the night air would creep in from the water, creating a comfortable breeze, sometimes chilly but pleasant all the same. Nicholas would sit on the porch for hours, playing cards with her, trying to help her fall asleep. Two friends sharing stories and tears. God, she missed him.
    Lily sighed with the thought of her restless nights. They started once Keith decided she needed to leave. The thought of being alone the rest of her life, of never being good enough for anyone because of her depraved sexual needs, brought terrible nightmares. Tony had to come more often to help her get to sleep. He’d taken on more than he’d bargained for. Surely, he’d grown tired of her. A pang of sadness crept into her belly. Not now. Don’t cry now!
    When she reached the stable house, Adam was sitting in the green Adirondack chair on the porch. His smile greeted her before his voice had the chance. “You came,” he said as he stood to take the heavy dish from her arms.
    “Yes.” She scrunched her brow. “Why wouldn’t I?”
    “You sounded unsure earlier.” He opened the screen door for her to step through. “I’m glad you’re here.”
    Lily heard him gasp when she passed by. Quickly, she turned to face him. His green eyes were wide with surprise. Lily had forgotten about the pale pink welts still lacing her back and shoulder. Her pale yellow chemise only covered half of her upper back. Lily hastily donned her sweater and raised her chin. She could tell he wasn’t sure whether to speak or keep the hell quiet. Think, Lily, think!
    “Something smells wonderful.” She swallowed through the dryness in her throat. “Is there anything I can help with?”
    Adam snapped his mouth shut and maneuvered around her to get to the kitchen. “Um, no,” he said as he kept his back to her and set the dish on the counter. “Would you like some wine?”
    “That’d be lovely.” She walked around the room, studying the piles Adam had organized. She clutched the edges of her sweater in an attempt to stop trembling.
    Nicholas’s clothes had always seemed to find a place on the back of chairs, on the