Free Love and Decay, Kane's Law by Rachel Higginson Page A

to terms with
that, the sooner you will be able to move forward.”
    I left her gaping at me to padlock the front
door. I dropped the keys back into my pocket and felt comfort at
the heavy weight in my pocket. I felt even more ease with Reagan
taking up so much space in my house. Not physical space, but
metaphysical, philosophical, spiritual space.
    And that’s what she didn’t understand.
    I was a kidnapper to her.
    But she was my redemption.

Chapter Four
     
    I finished checking the upstairs and assured
myself I’d gone over the downstairs three times. But there was this
uneasy feeling sitting in my chest, winding me up in funny ways. I
looked over at Reagan and tried to believe she wouldn’t just
disappear into thin air- that she was real, that she was mine.
    The feeling of impending loss didn’t leave,
though.
    And I hated her for a moment. I hated that
she made me care about her so deeply after only one day. I hated
that I suddenly couldn’t imagine going back to the lonely, solitary
existence I’d enjoyed before she walked into my life. And I hated
that every time I looked at her a swelling ache ignited in my chest
and consumed me in a fire of lust, longing and something
stronger.
    I wanted her.
    I wanted to kiss her.
    I wanted to talk to her for hours and
hours.
    I wanted to make her breakfast… lunch…
dinner.
    I wanted to do the dishes side by side.
    I wanted to whisper “goodnight” and stretch
out beside her in the early dawn and croak “good morning.”
    I wanted her smile focused on me.
    I wanted her laughter to fill my home.
    I wanted her hand in mine.
    Her body underneath me.
    And most of all her soul.
    I wanted her everything.
    She looked up at me, a hesitant glance in
which her eyes were uncertain and her brow furrowed with confusion.
I didn’t have those things I wanted tonight, but the press of her
lips and her mystified silence told me I could have them one
day.
    She’d been perfect today. She hadn’t meant to
be- in fact, I thought she might have meant to be the opposite. But
still, it was like she was created specifically for me and this
place.
    She’d seen the process for which most people
come into our Colony. She’d been furious with our methods. Her
cheeks had heated, her petite body shook with self-righteous
indignation and the only thought I could process through my foggy
brain was how badly I wanted to take that passion and kiss her
until it was focused solely on me. She was utterly
breath-taking.
    I could watch her for hours.
    There’d been moments between us all day. She
hated me. I told myself this was a normal reaction and that I would
change her opinion. But she wasn’t quiet about her feelings. And
while I wished she felt differently, I looked forward to the time
when she was as vocal about the good stuff too.
    Eventually, I needed to speak with my father.
I took her to the laundry room and put her to work. She needed time
away from me to appreciate what I could do for her, how I could
help her live. And I needed to check my instincts about her and run
this by Matthias.
    I’d left her for a little bit with an easy
chore and women I trusted to keep an eye on her. I sought out my
father and checked on Miller- although I tried to keep myself at an
emotional distance.
    Miller was as stubborn as all hell. And my
father had been uncharacteristically lenient with him. They were
together in my father’s office. He’d been forcing Miller to sit
there through his daily business. It wasn’t the worst punishment he
could have doled out, but Miller had trouble sitting still. Plus,
it hadn’t helped that his hands were still cuffed behind his back
and he was oozing blood from various places all over his body.
    “I’m surprised you picked her,” my father had
said immediately. He wasn’t one to beat around the bush.
    “Why is that?” I drawled casually, forcing
myself to disguise my disappointment.
    “She’s…” He couldn’t seem to find the right
word while he stared