Free Curse of Arachnaman by Hayden Thorne

suckers were glued to his skull."
    "You suck, Peter."
    "No, your alien twin did. I should weigh your brain while you're asleep and see how much was vacuumed out of you before your mom gave birth."
    Okay, we were so going to break up after this.
    The fast-food girl, whose name was Sasha, according to her tag, shook her head and slowly crept away. Peter sighed and leaned forward, eyes flashing. Have I ever mentioned how hot he looked when he glared at me? Have I? Okay, my boyfriend was hot . Especially when I pissed him off, which was pretty often. “You have ten seconds to tell me what's going on,” he said.
    "It's stupid,” I retorted. “I don't want to talk about it."
    "Why not?"
    "Because I don't want to. And it's stupid. Did I just hear an echo?"
    "Your best friend's out there, staring at you, screwing up our date, and freaking out the staff. Tell me."
    "No."
    "I brought a clean towel."
    I smirked while gnawing away like an anemic cow that just stuffed its face with a bucket of plump, juicy, organic grass. “Big deal. You bring clean towels all the time."
    Peter didn't miss a beat. He didn't even blink, the shameless bastard. “It's a beach towel."
    "She's making me go with her to her grandmother's bingo night, and I told her no after I said yes! There! Happy? And that towel had better be shredded by the time we're done this evening!” I paused and then backpedaled. “Condoms? Did you say that you brought condoms, too?"
    "You wish,” he said. “Sorry, no condoms. I believe in waiting for the right moment because I'm old-fashioned that way.” Yeah, right . He slid down his seat and stumbled to his feet. “And I'm hauling Althea's pissy ass in here because I'm starving, and I can't stand another second of being put off my dinner because of some stupid promise about bingo night."
    I sat there, watching Peter saunter off. “You tricked me again? I hate it when you play dirty!” I snarled, but by the time the words came, he'd already stepped outside.
    I suppose the only comfort I had then was his mention of a beach towel. Not a bath towel, mind you, but a beach towel. You know, like Aladdin's flying carpet. Okay, so it wasn't exactly as awesome as airborne Arabian rugs, but my point is that beach towels, by their very nature, promise any horny sixteen-year-old the moon and the stars and an infinity of amazing cosmic supernovas between him and his boyfriend. I turned the idea over and over in my mind, barely noticing the two figures shambling past the doors and making their way to our booth.
    "Watch out,” Althea's voice cut through my thoughts. “I know that look. Eric's up to something again."
    "Whatever it is you're planning, forget it,” Peter said as he slid back on his seat, Althea taking her place beside him.
    "If you check under the table,” she said, “I'm sure you'll find that it's got something to do with you."
    I coughed, nearly blowing soda through my nose. “Shut up, Horace."
    "Nice to see you, too, Mister Senator.” Althea glanced at Peter. “He's starting out pretty young, you know, breaking promises left and right."
    I rolled my eyes. “If I promised you something, Althea, it's because I was coerced. Yeah, you heard me. Coerced. So I'm taking my promise back."
    "I didn't coerce you!"
    "Uh, should I remind you about the—” Here I raised both hands and made the quotation marks sign with my fingers. “—accidentally-moving cables that got me in my own bedroom and held me up like a human burrito for a gazillion seconds till I had to scream ‘I promise I'll go with you'? Seriously, all this time I was under the impression that Peter's the dirtiest player on the planet. He's got nothing to you and your criminal mind.” I turned to Peter. “Did she tell you what happened? How she cheated me in a game of Hangman and then made my computer puke out cyber cables or something that attacked me? You know, I've heard about tentacle sex online, and what Althea pulled with her crazy cyber cables