Free Wounded by God's People by Anne Graham Lotz Page B

squeezed tightly shut as you relive over and over again the hurtful actions or words that have wounded you? The memory of one impossible expectation or one infuriating expression, one unfair decision or one unreasonable demand, one injustice or one insult, one wound or one wrong, can bring back to our minds another one and another one until we are smothered ina nasty heap of ugliness that hardens our hearts and embitters our spirit and blinds us to the obvious — our own faults and sin.
    It’s both interesting and sad to think how easily you and I can see the faults in others while absolving ourselves of responsibility for what our actions or words may have provoked. Although Sarah’s behavior could indeed have been characterized as mean, Hagar failed to acknowledge how her contempt and scorn had provoked Sarah. 3 When we are wounded, hurt feelings and injured pride can distort our perspective and our focus. In self-defense, we want to explain and excuse and blame the ones who wounded us. We want to prove our point —
I
was right; they were wrong. How dare they treat me this way!
We tend to rationalize our own behavior while holding others to a standard we don’t apply to ourselves. It’s revealing to note that when we point a finger at someone else, we literally have three fingers pointing back at ourselves!
    Jesus addressed this spiritual blindness in the Sermon on the Mount when He admonished the crowd: “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” 4
    When you and I focus on the speck of sin in the other person’s life while paying no attention to the plank in our own, God will begin to get our attention. He may use a lack of peace, an absence of joy, an agitation of spirit, a knot in the pit of our stomachs, a dullness or depression in our emotions, or something else to alert us that we are not all right. Because God truly loves you and me, He won’t let us getby with excuses, rationalizations, and self-defense. A spiritual blind spot is something He will seek to correct.
    The correction can be hard to take when it comes through someone else. For myself, I want to give the Angel of the Lord my full attention in order for the correction to come from Him, not another person. In my experience, when it does come from Him, although it is specifically pinpointed, He opens my eyes of self-awareness quite gently and lovingly, yet firmly. There is no blame or condemnation. Just truth and light and assurance that as I confess and submit to His correction I am right with Him, and I have the hope that one day I will be right with others. He taught me this in a fresh way not too long ago …
    A lovely and longtime friend emailed me one day to set up a time when she could talk with me about something on her mind. She didn’t tell me what it was, just that she needed some time to talk. I knew she was aware that I was going through a difficult time, both personally and in ministry. She had helped me with some ministry initiatives in the past, and the thought crossed my mind that perhaps she wanted to offer her assistance once again.
    When we met, I embraced her warmly, and we spent twenty minutes or so just catching up as friends. She described a broken relationship between her siblings and how grieved she was at their unwillingness to forgive one another. I assured her I would pray for healing in her family relationships. Then I asked why she had wanted to meet with me. In tears, she explained that because I had hurt her in the past, she had made the decision not to help me with the ministry challenges I was currently facing. In fact, she said she