Free Resistance (Dark Realm Series) by Patricia Mason

Dark after killing off his entire family, including his mother. Since
then he's been busy creating a vampire aristocracy and gathering all sorts of
paranormal creatures into his sphere. Only trouble is, humans are becoming
scarce in his world so he'd like to get control of me so I can open up other
dimensions for conquering.

 
    Leopold (laughing as he appears in the
mirror): Kizzy, you make me sound so evil.

 
    Kizzy: Hello Your Highness. I didn't
realize you'd already arrived. I'm just telling them a few facts.

 
    Leopold: You'll have these nice people
thinking that I'm some kind of villain. While it's true I will do anything and
everything to do my duty to my subjects, I believe that clearly makes me the
hero, not the villain.

 
    Kizzy: Whatever floats your coffin.

 
    Leopold: I do not understand this idiom.

 
    Kizzy: Never mind. So, what new schemes
are you plotting against the human race these days?

 
    Leopold: You do not expect me to reveal
my plans so easily do you?

 
    Kizzy: It was worth a try.

 
    Leopold (shaking his head sadly): Am I
really so different from you? You want to save your friends and family. I
merely want to save my people.

 
    Kizzy: You used my friends as your
personal sippy cups. Should I thank you for that?

 
    Leopold: My subjects — vampire,
ghoul and the like— require humans as food. Am I to disregard my duty and
allow them to starve? To perish in the most horrible of deaths? No I must
provide for them. In this world, all free-range humans have been or soon will
be rounded up and placed in the feedlot system. But we need an influx of new
food sources and the only choice is to go outside this world.

 
    Kizzy: So you admit you're killing
people.

 
    Leopold: All human feedlots in my empire
are run to the strictest of industry standards for production. Food stock is
treated in the most humane way possible.

 
    Kizzy: Yeah. You suck 'em dry and use
their bones for toothpicks. Real humane.

 
    Leopold: Would it be better to allow them
to be hunted down in the wild? No. It is better this way. Our system ensures
that the humans do not feel pain or fear. They are virtually unconscious. In a
trance.

 
    Kizzy: Like zombies.

 
    Leopold: No. Zombies are brain-eating
fiends. They are rotting flesh. I would not suck on them if—

 
    Kizzy: I get it. There's a difference.

 
    Leopold: Let us not argue, dear Kizzy. We
will agree to disagree. But let me say how happy I am to be here today to
communicate directly to my fans in your world.

 
    Kizzy: Fans? What fans?

 
    Leopold: Come now, Kizzy. I am a ruler of
great power and wealth. If I may be immodest for a moment, I also possess good
looks and charisma. I embody a very attractive combination. Of course I have
fans in your world.

 
    Kizzy: No, I don't agree.

 
    Leopold: Besides, you Americans love
British royalty. I have heard, for example, about your admiration for one of
the descendents I would have had but for my transformation. The wedding of
Prince William to a girl named Kate was quite a popular event in your world by
all accounts.

 
    Kizzy: Yes, but that's different. They
are a beautiful young human couple in love and living a romantic fairytale.
You're a...a ...

 
    Leopold: Blood sucking monster?

 
    Kizzy: If the fangs fit.

 
    Leopold: Is that sarcasm?

 
    Kizzy: Oh no. Not a drop.

 
    Leopold: Just because I used a couple of
your friends for —what did you call it? — a sippy cup, does not
require a fit of ill manners on your part.

 
    Kizzy: Why don't we try a few questions
about your likes and dislikes for the throng of "fans" you imagine
you have out there? I'll throw a few choices out and you go with your first
answer.

 
    Leopold: Ah yes. This is bit like word
association. My psychoanalyst has utilized this technique on me to explore my
Oedipal issues.

 
    Kizzy: Your psychoanalyst?

 
    Leopold: Yes. Sigmund Freud.

 
    Kizzy: Is Freud a vampire in