Free Stronger than You Know by Jolene Perry

that’s silly, I told him no first. Well, not no . Maybe . Almost the same thing, right?
    â€œDo you have the car today?” I whisper.
    He nods.
    â€œMaybe you could give me a ride home?” I can’t believe those words just came out of my mouth. What am I thinking?
    His smile is back. “Okay.”
    I feel my mouth pull into a smile to match his.
    This whole situation with Justin makes me feel this huge burst of hope. But then I remember Trent and his girlfriend in the den when he gave her a ride home. Is that what Justin will expect?
    Why didn’t I think of that before I asked? I can’t get in his car if that’s what he’ll want. Can’t.
    It’s raining hard when school is over, but I have my raincoat, so I’m good. The walk is short. I pull my hood up as I step out of the school.
    â€œYou’re not trying to ditch me, are you?” Justin’s voice behind me is tinged with laughter.
    â€œI …” I don’t know what you’ll expect from me if you give me a ride home .
    â€œYou are …” He’s still smiling. That’s good. “Have you still not figured out how irresistible I am?”
    â€œWhat?” Is he serious?
    â€œI’m kidding, Joy.” He shakes his head.
    â€œIt’s just …”
    â€œAll I want is to talk with you outside of class. Just a ride. I’ll drop you off, and that’s it.” He holds his hands out, palms up. “Promise.”
    â€œThat’s it?” I’m leaning toward him I want to believe him so bad; there’s just this other side of me that knows we’re about to be in a car together, and I’m not sure that’s a good idea.
    â€œYeah. Totally not a big deal. Just a ride.”
    Okay. Totally no big deal. I can do this. Now I just need to say something. “Where’s your car?”
    â€œCome on.” He gestures toward the school lot with his head.
    We walk together through the downpour to a sad, faded black car.
    â€œSo, this is it.” He opens the passenger door for me.
    â€œCool.” That feels like the right thing to say.
    He chuckles. “Not so much, no. But it’s what I could afford.” He closes the door behind me and gets in on his side.
    I take in a deep breath. Okay, I’m okay. I’m in a car, alone with a boy. I try to take another breath and it’s shaky. “I need my window down.”
    He pauses. “It’s cold outside. And raining.”
    â€œPlease?” I’d rather ask him for something crazy than hyperventilate.
    The small car rattles as the engine warms up and I roll my window down. As insane as having the window down seems, or, I guess, as insane as it is , I have an escape so I feel okay in here. I’m so not putting needs an open window on my list of crazy things. I’m in the car. That counts for something.
    â€œYou’re really quiet.”
    â€œYou’re just now noticing?” Listen to me, teasing him and everything. I definitely need to call Lydia.
    â€œNo. We’ve been in school for two months, and it took me that long to ask you out, and then you sort of said no.” We’re in a line of cars waiting to get out of the school parking lot.
    â€œI said maybe,” I correct him.
    â€œWhy didn’t you say yes?” he asks as he gives me a glance.
    â€œI … I don’t know.” Mostly because I’m still scared.
    â€œIt’s cool we’re talking though.”
    â€œWhat?”
    â€œI’ve just … I’ve wanted to talk since you came to school, but … I guess I’m a coward or something.” He smiles.
    I’m not sure what to make of him yet. “Oh.”
    The line inches forward, and Justin flips on the radio, tapping his steering wheel to the beat. I watch, envious at how relaxed he seems.
    We finally pull out of the lot and onto the roadway.
    â€œWanna get a hot chocolate or a coffee or something