he released me and took his bags to his room.
I took in the room. The living room portion had yellow walls with white trim. It contrasted nicely with the blue furniture and blue carpet. I had a desk, a dining room table, and even a fireplace. I was in awe already and it was just the living room.
I walked into the bedroom to see the giant king sized bed, with white sheets and comforter that helped contrast the blue and white on the wall and the blue carpet. I was starting to think about painting my home in California this color blue. The toilet sat in the middle of the bathroom and there was a tub to my right and a glass shower to my left. They were even nice enough to leave me a remote controlled radio for my long relaxing baths.
They left me a list on the bed of services and amenities. I called immediately and scheduled a spa appointment. Andrew had said whatever I wanted was on the company's dime. I wanted a massage bad enough to let them pay for it. After I hung up with the spa, I stared at the room. The living room was bigger than my entire house in California and I suddenly felt overwhelmed.
I grabbed my suitcase and changed into a pair of skinny jeans, my black calf-high Uggs, and a gray and white geometric sweater. I fixed my makeup, then grabbed my A-line black coat to go outside and get some New York air. Once I was ready to go, I thought about asking Andrew to come since I was familiar with the area and he wasn’t, but I needed to clear my head. The words Helen had said made me think that maybe I was a sitting duck: that I was only floating on the water because no one had come to be my life raft.
I usually let words roll off of me, but those words had me thinking about them. They even had me thinking about how her story would make a great book. I could write her story, but that was part of my life with Chase and anti-virus sales are my life now.
I set out on Lexington Avenue and was just going to walk a few blocks and soak up the city I loved. I could still smell the hot dog vendor’s cart that sits on the corner during the day. I could imagine the horns honking as cabs waited in traffic that never moved. I stuck out my arms and spun myself as the snow began to fall.
I smiled when I came to a stop sign, then started walking. I saw the Bull & Bear when I rounded the corner and decided a drink would be wonderful. I walked inside and took a seat at the bar.
“ Black Russian, please.” I called to the bartender.
“ Do I know you?” a strange man spoke with a slurred voice.
“ No, I don’t think you do.” I replied sweetly, as the bartender brought me my drink.
“ Yes, I do. You were Chase Matson’s fiancé.” He spoke with slurred words. “I am sorry for your loss; he was a great man.” Chills rolled down my spine. I downed my drink and ordered another.
“ Sir, I just want to enjoy a drink and not talk about anything with anyone.” I whispered, and he nodded. He slowly got up and whipped out his cell phone as I downed another drink of numbing juice. I looked over and saw him on the phone with someone, with a new drink in his hand.
I tried to place him as I ordered another shot. I stared at his demeanor and knew he had been on the force, but couldn’t place him; maybe because I had had three drinks by then and was feeling no pain. The room had moments of fuzziness, but I wasn’t drunk, merely tipsy. I ordered another drink and the bartender advised me to eat or slow down. I was reluctant, but ordered a burger, since the bartender seemed serious about cutting me off if I kept going.
The burger and fries were delicious. They didn’t have food like this in California. I promised myself that I would eat at every place I had been missing before I went home. My phone lit up and I saw a message from an unknown number and instantly felt a twinge of guilt. It had to be Jax. I just knew it had to be him because I had called him. I wasn’t going to check the message, so I cleared it and placed my
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