Free Off Limits by Lindsay McKenna

laughter was soft, mingled. Alex glanced up and nearly drowned in the smoky blueness of Jim’s eyes. The change in him was startling, wonderful. The urge to reach up, touch his unshaven cheek and kiss him, was overwhelming. Alex saw his eyes change and grow narrowed. Her breath snagged as she read that intent: he wanted to kiss her, too. The moment crystalized—then dissolved as the haunted expression returned to his face, conquering his need of her.
    Returning her attention to the rice, Alex ate in silence. What terrible shadow loomed over Jim?
    â€œWhat I don’t understand,” Jim said, trying to ease the sudden awkwardness between them, “is why you don’t have a man.”
    â€œMostly because of my schooling, Jim. I have a straight-A average—my father wouldn’t settle for anything less.” She gave him a wry look. “A congressman’s daughter has to be the best at everything, didn’t you know?”
    He heard the sarcasm in her voice. “Has it always been like that for you? Those kinds of expectations and pressures?”
    â€œSure. Case and Buck got straight A’s without ever cracking a book. Me? I have to study my head off night and day to make those grades. Mother says I have her genes. She struggled through school, too.”
    â€œThis nursing, is it what you want to do?”
    Alex nodded. “More than anything in the world. I’m a lot like my mother, I guess. She had dreams of being a nurse, too, but she married my father when she was eighteen, so she never got the chance. In some ways, I’m following her dream.”
    â€œI bet you’ll make a fine nurse.”
    â€œIf I can get past my reaction to blood,” Alex said wryly. She finished the last of the rice and handed the bowl back to him. Jim helped her lie back down and tucked the blanket around her.
    Busying himself with the heating tab and making more rice for them, Jim said, “A nurse who can’t stand the sight of blood? What will you do about it?”
    â€œThere are lots of different kinds of nursing, Jim. One area that really intrigues me is psychology. I’ve chosen to go into psychiatric nursing.”
    â€œOh, the shrinks,” he teased.
    â€œI know our society thinks psychology is for crazy people, but they’re wrong. There are a lot of reasons why humans react the way they do to certain stresses, certain situations.”
    â€œNo argument from me,” he said as he held the canteen cup over the lighted magnesium tab to heat the water. The odor from the tab stung his nostrils, and he moved as far away as he could. It was a stringent, stinging odor. The smell of the magnesium could bring VC to the tunnel; it was a risk to do this.
    â€œMy ma said my pa was never the same after the big war.”
    â€œBattle fatigue,” Alex guessed grimly. “Even now, I’m getting horrible nightmares that are a part of the symptom pattern. I’m sure I’ll have them for a long time afterward. I learned those things in my psychology classes. I like understanding how our feelings run our mind and vice versa.”
    â€œWell,” Jim whispered, “this war is going to do a lot of damage to every man and woman who gets trapped in it.” Looking over at Alex, he added, “We’re going to need people like you to help us heal afterward.”
    The question was on her lips to ask about Jim’s trauma that continued to haunt his eyes and his voice. Alex felt miraculously better. Was it because of the sulfa powder fighting her infection or because Jim had come back safely to her? Sleep snagged Alex, and she told him she was going to rest. This time her dreams were about Jim kissing her, and her kissing him back. The coming days would reveal her future. Would the sulfa drugs halt the infection enough so that she could make it to a marine firebase? Would Jim help her get close to one? Or would she have to try to brave it on her own?