Free Where the Rain Gets In by Adrian White

company. She felt the difference in their
ages for the first time; for all Mike’s sophistication, he seemed suddenly very
young again when he told Katie he’d be returning to his parents’ house in
Belfast for the holidays.
    “You know,” said Mike, “you’re more than
welcome to come over to Belfast.”
    Katie couldn’t imagine what that would
be like – Christmas amongst Mike’s large extended family – but she knew it
wasn’t for her. She was grateful for Mike’s offer, but didn’t like to think
that he’d picked up on her loneliness.
    “Bruno will still be around,” Mike told
her. Katie had developed a parallel friendship with Bruno, but she still wasn’t
quite at her ease in his company. She tried to avoid seeing him when they
weren’t all together in a crowd.
    “It’s not an issue,” she said.
    “I’ve bought you a Christmas present,”
said Mike, before he left. He handed Katie an envelope. “It’s a membership card
for the new gym and fitness centre in town – brand new facilities and
everything. You’ll love it.”
    “I don’t want this,” said Katie and then
she corrected herself. “I mean, thank you, but I don’t want you to be buying me
presents.”
    “Well,” said Mike, “if truth be told, I
didn’t actually buy it, and it’s not just for you – we all have one, so we can
all use the gym together.”
    “You’re going to start using the gym?”
said Katie, and smiled.
    “I will this one – you should see it.”
    “And how did you get the membership?”
she asked.
    “It’s part of a sponsorship deal, but
that’s not important – ”
    “Sponsorship deal – sponsorship for
what? Oh, forget it! Look, Mike, I appreciate the thought, even if there’s
nothing wrong with the gym I use in the college, and it’s closer, but I don’t
want you to be giving me things; I don’t want you to be doing all these things
for me.”
    “But I like to,” said Mike.
    “But I can’t . . . I can’t do anything
for you.”
    “You don’t need to do anything for me;
I’m not looking for anything from you.”
    But this wasn’t true, and they both knew
it.
    “You know what I mean,” said Katie. “I
can’t let myself get close to you – to anyone.”
    “I know that,” said Mike and then, “I
just like you, that’s all.”
    Again, they both knew this wasn’t true.
    “But nothing will ever happen, Mike. I
won’t ever change, not ever.”
    “I’m not asking you to change; I’m just
giving you a Christmas present and I’d be happier if you accept it. It’ll be
fun, you’ll see, when we all get back in the New Year, and we can all hang out
there together.”
    In his own way, Mike was anticipating
the rising social scene of the gym, but he was also doing what he’d repeatedly
done over the past few months: using their group of friends to involve Katie in
an activity in which she felt safe. This was his way of helping her and she
knew it.
    “Thank you,” she said, “thank you. And I
hope you have a great time with your folks over Christmas.”
    She needed the gym membership once she
realised the college facilities closed down for the holiday, and Mike was right
– it was a beautiful gym. Her beloved library, too, let her down, and she
switched back to working in the library in town. There were fewer reference
works to consult, but she had a workspace in which to complete her essays on
time. She took to using the new gym once the library closed for the day.
    Coming back from town one evening, she
cut across from Oxford Road and crossed the Parkway by the footbridge rather
than walking around by the road. As soon as she stepped on to the bridge she
knew something wasn’t right. Everywhere was quieter for a start, with few if
any students around. There was less reason to be crossing from the college over
into Hulme and, because this wasn’t Katie’s normal route, she hadn’t been
walking with her usual confidence and assurance. At the far end of the bridge
she could