Free Get Smart 7 - Max Smart - The Spy Who Went Out to the Cold by William Johnston Page A

she?”
    “He’s out there on the desert. Now—”
    “Comin’ fur ’er, is he?”
    “I doubt it,” Max answered. “It blew away from him and we found it. Now—”
    “Then it’s yurs,” Cap’n O’Patterer said. “That’s the law o’ the sea, Jackson. Flotsam and jetsam. Or, to put it the way you landlubbers maul it—finders keepers, losers weepers. Tell you what I’ll do. You got the itch to get to o’ Alex and get runned down by a crosstown bus, eh? I’ll trade you—far and squar—my houseboat for your four-master.”
    “That wouldn’t be fair,” Max replied. “It has a hole in it.”
    “Don’t no more. I patched it up a couple days ago, Johnny.”
    “I mean the ship has a hole in it.”
    Cap’n O’Patterer shrugged. “Don’t make no nevermind to me, Willie,” she said. “Don’t ’tend to sail her. Gonna let her sit. I’m retirin’, ya see. Gonna perch up there in the riggin’ and watch the boats go by.”
    “Oh. Well, in that case,” Max said, “it’s a deal.”
    Max and Cap’n O’Patterer shook hands to seal the bargain, then the captain climbed the rigging of the four-master, and Max, 99 and von BOOM got aboard the houseboat.
    “Max, are you sure you can sail this?” 99 said.
    “Nothing to it, 99. We’ll just push off, then drift with the current.”
    “I don’t know, Max. It seems so simple . . . There must be more to it than that. Shouldn’t you ask Cap’n O’Patterer?”
    “Have a little faith, 99. Get hold of one of those poles and help me get the boat off the beach.”
    Using the poles, Max and 99 freed the houseboat from the sand, while von BOOM looked on.
    “There we are,” Max smiled victoriously. “We’re floating—free as a bird.”
    “We’re not moving,” von BOOM said.
    “Nonsense. We’re in the water, aren’t we?”
    “We’re not moving,” von BOOM repeated.
    Max looked over the side. The boat was not moving. He shouted up to Cap’n O’Patterer. “One thing—” he began.
    “Pull up yur dum-doo-dee-doo-doo anchor, Marvin!” she shouted back.
    “Oh.”
    Max hoisted the anchor and a moment later the houseboat began drifting along with the current, headed in the direction of Alexandria at the mouth of the Nile.
    “One word o’ caution, Reggie!” Cap’n O’Patterer bellowed after them. “Always pull ’er over to shore when it comes up a heavy rain!”
    “Why?” Max bellowed back.
    “She gets water in the basement!” Cap’n O’Patterer replied.
    “Basement, Max?” 99 said puzzledly.
    “She means the hold, 99. On a houseboat, it’s called the basement.”
    “I see.”
    The day passed quietly. Von BOOM sat on deck, reading a book he had found in the cabin. Max and 99 took turns steering. When they were not at the helm, they lounged in deck chairs.
    “I think we’ve given KAOS the slip, 99,” Max said. “From now on, it looks like clear sailing.”
    “Doesn’t that seem a little odd to you, Max?” 99 replied. “We’ve never been able to outwit KAOS so easily before.”
    “Practice makes perfect, 99.”
    That night they anchored the houseboat near the bank of the river. Max and 99, who were weary from steering, stretched out on bunks to get some sleep. Von BOOM was still wide-awake, however. So he stayed up, reading by lamplight.
    Abruptly, in the middle of the night, Max was roused by a sound. He sat up. The cabin was completely dark.
    “Von BOOM?” he called.
    “You don’t have to shout,” a rough voice that he did not recognize replied.
    “Who is that?” Max demanded.
    “Ain’t nobody here but us river pirates,” the voice replied.
    At the same moment, a beam of light flashed in Max’s face.
    “Cut that out!” Max complained. “I can’t see!”
    “You don’t want to see a river pirate, anyway—it’s scary,” the voice said.
    A different voice spoke up. “The lights won’t go on,” it said. “They must’ve blown a fuse.”
    “Max!” 99 cried out. “What’s happening?”
    The beam of