states. They had signs and literature that they were
passing out about their anti-war activities.”
“Brian, we’ve never once
protested at a funeral,” I assured him. “That would be rude and disrespectful
of the people who’ve sacrificed their lives for our right to oppose war.”
“Then what do you do?” he
asked. “What’s the purpose of an anti-war group that doesn’t protest?”
“We do protest,” I said.
“We protest against unjust wars that use our military service people as cannon
fodder. We protest against the government’s lack of concern for the service
people who’ve returned home after the wars, and we protest against the use of
violence to ensure peace! It’s all wrong!”
“It’s not wrong,” he
muttered.
“Yes! It is horribly
wrong to send young men and women out to fight a war that is simply about
protecting oil and resources!” I yelled. “How can you say it’s not?”
“Because I fought the
war! I fought for freedom and democracy and to get rid of a dictator that had
brutally oppressed his people for decades!” Brian shouted back. “I was there,
little girl. I saw what was going on and fought to bring peace to those people.”
“Little girl? Little
girl?” I was pissed. “Don’t you dare dismiss me simply because I haven’t been
over to Iraq and fought in the war. That’s the most
asinine argument I’ve ever heard!”
“Oh really?” Brian
crossed the room and stood not more than a foot from me as he continued. “Then
please explain to me why I went over there and spent years on the ground
helping secure the territory. Please explain why I spent so much time away from
my friends and family in order to patrol the cities and prevent violence.
Please explain why I watched civilians get blown up by their own countrymen who
were trying to kill me and my team! Please explain, Ava, why…” Brian stopped as
a look of anguish tore across his face.
“Brian…” I began.
“No! Please explain why I
watched my best friend die,” he choked on the words and then looked into my
eyes and said, “Tell me why, Ava. Tell me why anything I did mattered. Tell me
why the sacrifices we all made were required. Tell me, Ava, would you please?”
I had no answer for him.
I had been stunned into silence by his tirade against my involvement with what
I had seen as an honest attempt to stop war from happening. I hadn’t really
thought about it from the soldiers’ point of view other than to not want any of
them to be hurt or killed in the fighting of wars that weren’t of their making.
“Look, I have no
answers,” I said as I reached out and gently touched his arm. Brian shrunk from
my touch, but I continued. “All I wanted to do was to stop the needless
fighting. I didn’t want people dying - not any people! I thought that if I got
involved in the group we could petition our representatives and persuade others
to sign the petition requesting that the U.S not get involved in wars that
aren’t about freedom or democracy.”
Brian continued staring
at my feet as I spoke. “I have never in my life ever done anything as rude or
disrespectful as to protest at a soldier’s funeral, and I never would. I just
don’t want people to die, Brian. That’s all. I just don’t want you or anyone
you know to die in combat!”
I stood in front of him,
out of breath and emotionally on edge from trying to explain myself. Brian
continued staring silently at the floor before he raised his head and looked
into my eyes. My heart cracked as I felt the waves of unspoken pain flowing
between us. I didn’t want to break the silence, so I held his gaze as he
reached out and ran a finger down my cheek before pushing the hair out of my
eyes.
“Ava,” he whispered. “Go
get dressed, you’re going to be late to your meeting.”
*****
As we walked to the
quad and headed for the meeting, I thought about what we’d said to one another
and I turned the discussion over and over as I thought about