Free Ain't No Sunshine by Leslie Dubois Page B

broken."
    "Stephen, you can't go on like this.  He's going to kill you.  Please get out of that house, if not for your own sake, then for mine. What would I do without you?  You're all I have."  Tears were streaming down her face, but she was holding back from breaking down completely.  I held her in my arms and let the tears fall on my bare chest.  I loved to hold her.  Taking care of her made me forget my own problems.
    "Look, Ruthie, I'm fine. Don't worry about me.  It was my fault anyway.  I shouldn't have held your hand in public like that. Maybe it was too soon."
    "He did this to you because we held hands?" she choked through the tears as she pulled away from me.  She was going to blame herself.  I couldn't let her do that.
    "No, Ruthie, it's not your fault."
    "I know it's not my fault, Stephen!" she yelled at me.  She wiped the tears from her face, trying to get control of her emotions.  I tried to quiet her down. Even though the library was completely empty, it still felt weird talking so loudly.
    "Ruthie, calm down."
    "I will not calm down!"  She pushed my hands away when I tried to hug her again.
    "Ruthie, please..."
    "Stephen, I know it's not my fault and it's not your fault either.  But you don't see that.  He's got you so brainwashed that you actually think you deserve his torture.  I've spent my whole life trying to convince you that you're worth more than that, that you deserve better, but you just don't get it!"
    " Shh !"  I covered her mouth as an old man came into the library.  He glanced around as if he had a question.  After a couple of minutes, when no one came to his assistance, he walked back out.  I let go of her mouth when she had calmed down a little.  She sat on the floor and put her face in her hands.
    "I can't do this anymore," she said finally. 
    "Okay, let's go somewhere else and talk."  I thought she meant she couldn't meet me in the library anymore, but it was much more serious than that.
    "No, that's not what I mean." She swallowed.  "I mean I can't do us anymore.  I can't sit back and watch him kill you, just like Matthew.  I can't take it.  I can't watch you die.  I can't lose someone else that I love." 
    "You're not going to lose me. I'll always be here for you. I promise." I held her to me tightly.
    Ruthie shook her head. "You can't promise that. Not when you live with that man."
    We sat on the ground holding each other for a moment. I had to think of a way to assure her.
    "You're right. You're absolutely right. I need to get away from him. But I need you to come with me.  Tonight."
    Ruthie pulled away and stared at me.
    "Tonight?" she said.
    "Yes, tonight. Why do we need to wait?" I said, staring into her eyes with a newfound sense of enthusiasm and hope. "I have some money saved up. We can get an apartment. I can get a better job; you can sell some paintings. Let's do it. Let's do it tonight."
    Ruthie looked down for a second. I thought she was going to reject me by claiming it was too dangerous, but instead she said, "Let's do it."
    We kissed each other with renewed vigor. Even after the librarian came back, we continued to hold and caress each other as we made our plans. We made arrangements to meet after midnight and drive to Washington DC so we could get married as close to where Martin Luther King had made his "I have a Dream" speech as possible. Tonight our dream was coming true.
    "If you change your mind, I'll understand," Ruthie said as she walked me to my truck. "If you don't come tonight, I'll have my answer and I won't hold it against you."
    "Nothing could stop me from being with you."
    When I got home my father was waiting for me.  He sat in the recliner next to the television and stared into nothingness. I probably could have slipped right past him and gone to my room without him even noticing. But for some reason I felt the need to stand up to him. I was entering a new stage in my life with Ruthie. If I wasn't strong enough to tell my father