Free The Collected Shorter Plays by Samuel Beckett

not forget? [
With passion
.]
But that’s what saves us!
    B [
searching through his papers
] Memory . . . memory . . . [
He takes up a sheet
.] I quote: “An elephant’s for the eating cares, a sparrow’s for the Lydian airs.” Testimony of Mr. Swell, organist at Seaton Sluice and lifelong friend.
[
Pause
.]
    A [
glum
] Tsstss!
    B I quote: “Questioned on this occasion”—open brackets—“(judicial separation)”—close brackets—“regarding the deterioration of our relations, all he could adduce was the five or six miscarriages which clouded”—open brackets—“(oh through no act of mine!)”—close brackets—“the early days of our union and the veto which in consequence I had finally to oppose”—open brackets—“(oh not for want of inclination!)”—close brackets—“to anything remotelyresembling the work of love. But on the subject of our happiness”—open brackets— “(for it too came our way, unavoidably, and here my mind goes back to the first vows exchanged at Wootton Bassett under the bastard acacias, or again to the first fifteen minutes of our wedding night at Littlestone-on-Sea, or yet again to those first long studious evenings in our nest on Commercial Road East)”—close brackets—“on the subject of our happiness not a word, Sir, not one word.” Testimony of Mrs. Aspasia Budd-Croker, button designer in residence, Commercial Road East.
    A [
glum
] Tsstss!
    B I quote again: “Of our national epos he remembered only the calamities, which did not prevent him from winning a minor scholarship in the subject.” Testimony of Mr. Peaberry, market gardener in the Deeping Fens and lifelong friend. [
Pause
.] “Not a tear was known to fall in our family, and God knows they did in torrents, that was not caught up and piously preserved in that inexhaustible reservoir of sorrow, with the date, the hour and the occasion, and not a joy, fortunately they were few, that was not on the contrary irrevocably dissolved, as by a corrosive. In that he took after me.” Testimony of the late Mrs. Darcy-Croker, woman of letters. [
Pause
.] Care for more?
    A Enough.
    B I quote: “To hear him talk about his life, after a glass or two, you would have thought he had never set foot outside hell. He had us in stitches. I worked it up into a skit that went down well.” Testimony of Mr. Moore, light comedian, c/o Widow Merryweather-Moore, All Saints on the Wash, and lifelong friend. [
Pause
.]
    A [
stricken
] Tsstss! [
Pause
.] Tsstsstss!
    B You see. [
Emphatic
.] This is not his home and he knows it full well.
[
Pause
.]
    A Now let’s have the positive elements.
    B Positive? You mean of a nature to make him think . . . [
hesitates, then with sudden violence
] . . . that some day things might change? Is that what you want? [
Pause. Calmer
.] There are none.
    A [
wearily
] Oh yes there are, that’s the beauty of it.
[
Pause. B rummages in his papers
.]
    B [
looking up
] Forgive me, Bertrand. [
Pause. Rummages. Looks up
.] I don’t know what came over me. [
Pause. Rummages. Looks up
.] A moment of consternation. [
Pause. Rummages
.] There is that incident of the lottery . . . possibly. Remember?
    A No.
    B [
reading
] “Two hundred lots . . . winner receives high class watch . . . solid gold, hallmark nineteen carats, marvel of accuracy, showing year, month, date, day, hour, minute and second, super chic, unbreakable hair spring, chrono escapement nineteen rubies, anti-shock, anti-magnetic, airtight, waterproof, stainless, self-winding, centre seconds hand, Swiss parts, de luxe lizard band.”
    A What did I tell you? However unhopefully. The mere fact of chancing his luck. I knew he had a spark left in him.
    B The trouble is he didn’t procure it himself. It was a gift. That you forget.
    A [
irritated
] I forget, I forget! And he, does he not— [
Pause
.] At least he kept it.
    B If you can call it that.
    A At least he accepted it. [
Pause
.] At least he didn’t refuse it.
    B I quote: “The last