Free Queen Mum by Kate Long Page B

think they only watch one programme a night or something.
And they’re always, what, around you. My lads, they spend three-quarters of their lives shut away in their bedrooms, you wonder what they get up to, or perhaps you’re best off
not knowing. I’d say, generally speaking, they need to loosen up.’
    ‘Who? Sophie and Pascale?’
    ‘All of them.’ Kim exhaled smoke into the garden. ‘I’ve got some ideas up my sleeve for next week. Should shake them up. In a fun way.’
    ‘Oh,’ I said. ‘Right.’ I wanted to argue that Juno was fun too but I didn’t know how to say it without it sounding limp. ‘Listen, from what you know of Juno
and your family, what do you think she’ll be doing in your house this week?’
    Kim gave a half-smile and leant her temple against the door jamb. ‘Banging her head against a brick wall, I should think,’ she said.
    Blue smoke curled up above her, off into the sky.
    *
    Juno – I don’t find this funny.
    Lee – Yeah, but, you’ve got to give them ten out of ten for initiative. And there’s no washing-up, so it’s also labour-saving.
    Marco – And you did a pizza. How come your pizza’s OK but our pizza’s wrong?
    Chris – ’Cause we even got a variety of toppings, so if somebody dun’t like chilli—
    Lee – He’s got a point. Very thoughtful, lads.
    Juno – The whole idea, and you know this, was for you to plan and shop for ingredients and then to cook a meal from scratch. Not to pick up the phone and have it
     delivered ready-made to your door. Apart from anything else, it’s not cost-effective. How much was all this?
    Marco – Did you get any change, Chris?
    Chris – Three quid.
    Marco – Twenty-two pounds.
    Juno – You see, you could have cooked an absolute mountain of pasta, popped in some lovely fresh veg, for about a quarter of that, do you see? I’m not being
     snobby here, it’s not that I have a problem with fast food per se—
    Lee – Where did you get the money?
    Marco – It’s ours. Our allowance. She should be grateful we spent our own money on her.
    Juno – How much money do you give them a week, Lee?
    Lee – A tenner each.
    Juno – A tenner? Each? My girls get half that, and they have to do jobs to earn it.
    Marco [Whispers to Chris] – Poor buggers.
    Juno – Thank you for that.
    Lee – Look, love, I’m going to say summat now, and I don’t want you to think I’m being rude, but I earn a good wage and I’m blowed if
     I’ll see my lads go short. ’Cause why else do you work, if it’s not to treat your family? They’re good boys, on the whole, but they want to go out with their mates,
     enjoy themselves while they’re young.
    Juno – But don’t you think it’s teaching them money comes too easily? Do you show them how to budget at all?
    Lee – I think the best way to learn with money is to make your own mistakes. And, I have to say, Juno, I know what your husband earns and I think you could afford
     a sight more than a fiver a week on your girls. I’d be the last person to accuse someone of being tight with money, but, honest . . .
    Chris – I got you olives on your pizza, see.
    Marco – She’s crying, Dad.
    Lee – Oh, bloody hell.
    Juno – It’s all right. I’m fine. It’s just been a long week. I’m missing Manny. I’m fine.
    Lee – Come on, love. Marco, pass us some kitchen roll.
    Juno – Why won’t you work with me?
    Chris – I got a Vienetta for afters.

Chapter Six
    That night Tom and I had the sad, clinging-together sex that we sometimes have these days. There were months when, after we went to bed, we lay apart, weighted down against the
mattress with grief. Then, about a year after Joe died, we had a period of really frantic sex, I don’t know why or where it came from. Possibly we were trying for another baby; I left my cap
out once or twice but I never conceived. Just as well. I’m not sure I could have opened myself up to all that potential heartbreak again. Now the sex we have is, what,