Free The Stuff of Nightmares by Malorie Blackman Page A

Being so alone was hell.
    ‘Keep smiling,’ Nurse Jennings said, straightening up. ‘It won’t do you any good. You won’t pull the wool over Doctor Jacobs’s eyes. And I’ll tell you something else—’
    ‘Thank you, Nurse Jennings. That will be all.’
    ‘Oh, Doctor Jacobs, I was … I was just …’ Nurse Jennings trailed off.
    Nurse Jennings and Dr Jacobs stood watching each other for countless silent seconds. I gave up trying to smile. It didn’t feel right anyway. Nurse Jennings left the room without another word. Dr Jacobs slid the door shut and walked over to me. My head began to feel fuzzy, muffled, like it was being stuffed with cotton wool. And heavy. So very heavy.
    ‘That’s it, Joe. You go to sleep. It’s the best thing for you.’ Dr Jacobs’s voice came from long ago and far away.
    It’s Jon, not Joe
. I wanted to tell her that, but I couldn’t open my mouth. I fought against falling asleep. I
couldn’t
fall asleep. That was when the nightmares came … But it was no good. I couldn’t keep my eyes open. Moments later I was washed away again.
    HARDER AND FASTER … His legs kicked off the bedcovers, kicked up towards the glinting and winking. The flashes of light moved up and down, up and down – striking at his arms, his legs. He twisted and writhed …
    I opened my eyes slowly. The room was dim with evening light. And then the pain started. My knees were on fire. I knew what that meant. They’d taken more of me. My legs below the knee were gone. I bit down on my bottom lip until my mouth filled with blood. My whole body shook with pain and dread. Whimpering noises burst through my lips even though they were still clamped shut. I couldn’t help it. Scalding tears burned my eyes. If only the pain would stop. If only …
    The door to my room slid open. Dr Jacobs entered.
    ‘Good! You’re awake.’ She smiled. Then she saw the tears on my face.
    ‘D-Doctor Jacobs, please,
please
don’t take any more of me,’ I pleaded. ‘I didn’t say anything when my arms were taken but you shouldn’t have cut off my legs as well. I didn’t deserve that.’
    Dr Jacobs frowned deeply. ‘There’s nothing wrong with your arms or your legs. Look for yourself. You still have limbs. We haven’t done anything to them.’
    ‘
Don’t take any more of me!
’ I shouted at her. ‘You all skirt around me and whisper about me. You want to drive me crazy. But I won’t let you do it. D’you hear? You’re the ones who are crazy. This isn’t a proper hospital. It can’t be. You just wait till my mum comes to see me. I want to leave this place. I need to leave—’
    ‘Joe—’
    ‘
I want to leave. Now!
’ I yelled. ‘
Now! Now! Now!
’
    A nurse ran into the room.
    ‘Get me fifty milligrams of pethidine,’ Dr Jacobs commanded.
    The nurse dashed out again.
    ‘Now then, Joseph—’ the doctor began.
    ‘Stop calling me that. My name is Jonathan.
Jonathan
. I know what you’re doing. You drug me until I’m senseless and then you cut off my limbs one by one …’ Unbidden, unwelcome tears streamed from my eyes. Snot ran from my nose, but I couldn’t wipe it away. The pain in my knees was easing slightly now, but what did that matter? I’d lost more of myself. I’d cried in private for my arms. But to take my legs as well …
    Dr Jacobs walked over to me and threw back the bedcovers. ‘Look! There are your arms, your legs …’
    I glanced down in spite of the fact that I knew she was lying. My legs below my knees and both my arms weren’t there – I knew they wouldn’t be.
    The nurse came back carrying a small tray. Dr Jacobs picked up the hypodermic syringe from the tray and immediately injected it into the top of my thigh. Within seconds my head was fuzzy again. The doctor handed over the needle to the nurse, who left the room at once. Nobody lingered around me. Except maybe Dr Jacobs. She laid a cool hand on one of my thighs.
    ‘Joe, can you feel that?’ she asked. Her frown was so