Free My Dog's a Scaredy-Cat by Henry Winkler

clinging onto his mom’s skirt. “I’m Spider-Man.”
    Of course he was. He wears his Spider-Man Halloween costume three hundred and sixtyfive days a year. I get that because when I was five, I wore my Aquaman costume all the time. Aquaman could swim through water faster than a submarine. I’d splash water all over myself so I’d look like I just swam out of the ocean, too. My mom spent a year with a towel hooked to her belt because every time she turned her back, I had soaked myself. When he was little, Frankie was obsessed with Luke Skywalker. You had to be very careful around him because he would constantly poke you in the butt with his light saber. It was a great day for my rear end when he finally outgrew that.
    â€œListen, Spider-Man,” I said to Tyler. “How would you like a piece of prune taffy?”
    â€œIck,” he said. “I want M&M’s. With peanuts.”
    â€œYou’re out of luck, buddy,” I said. “This isn’t exactly the best trick-or-treat stop in the building.”
    â€œTry my apartment,” Frankie called out. “Apartment 4B. My mom’s got lots of those little bags of M&M’s.”
    â€œAre there ghosts there, too?” Tyler asked.
    â€œNo, man. Just my brother Otis. The only thing scary about him is his breath.”
    Tyler turned and ran toward the elevator. As he and his mom got in, I heard footsteps coming out. I slammed the door fast, ditched the lights, and got back to my position just in time.
    Ding-dong .
    â€œDo you dare enter the chamber of fear?” I growled, opening the door a crack.
    â€œOf course I do. Why do you think I came over on a homework night?”
    Oh yes, that could only be the voice of Heather Payne. Leave it to her to bring up homework on the most fun night of the year.
    I opened the door and Heather came in. She was dressed as an old woman in a gray skirt with gray shoes and gray glasses and gray hair.
    Don’t tell me! Was Heather Payne trick-or-treating as Ms. Adolf?
    That might have been one of the scariest things I’d ever seen in my life. Who goes dressed up as their teacher, especially if their teacher is Ms. Adolf? It’s just not normal, I tell you.
    â€œSo where is this haunted house?” Heather said, tapping her gray shoe impatiently. “I don’t have all night, you know. We have a social studies report due next week, and I want to get an early start on it.”
    â€œFollow me . . . if your nerves can handle it,” I said.
    You have to give me credit for continuing to be scary. It wasn’t easy when you had a funpooper like Heather Payne on your hands.
    I led Heather down the hall and into the living room. If it had been anyone else, I probably would have taken her hand, but the thought of holding hands with Heather Payne . . . was . . . well, let’s not even go there.
    When we reached the haunted house, I held up the door flap.
    â€œYou may enter,” I said. “I hope you come out alive.”
    Heather went in. I followed her. Frankie was at the spider fishing pole. I could barely see him because he was dressed all in black so his clothes would blend into the darkness. I took my place behind the table with all the gooey things.
    â€œWander as you wish,” I whispered. “But beware of ghosts. The spirits are restless tonight.”
    First, Heather went to the skeleton with the black light inside his chest. She reached out to touch him. Plop! His arm fell off. We hadn’t planned that, but I thought it was a nice touch. Heather didn’t flinch, though. She just reached down and picked up the arm.
    â€œYour skeleton’s broken,” she said. “Try super glue. It’s very adhesive.”
    Mental note to self: Glue on skeleton arms BEFORE McKelty arrives.
    Next, Heather went to where Ashley’s head was sticking through the table.
    â€œPull the napkin off,” I whispered. “And be afraid. Very