Free Secrets Everybody Knows by Christa Maurice Page B

realized she had just used his favorite curse.
    “Well, I did learn something from you,” Elaine snapped. “Aren’t you proud?”
    “I’m not going to stand here and apologize over and over again. I should never have gotten involved with you. You were only sixteen, and I should have kept my hands to myself. Hate me all you like. I just don’t want you to ruin it now.”
    “Ruin what?”
    “You have a good life. You’re well respected.”
    “Good life? You think this is a good life? My God, have you been living under a bridge for the past fourteen years?” Elaine gripped the edge of a worktable so she wouldn’t throw herself into his arms. She’d be better off throwing herself under a train.
    “You always wanted to be a teacher. You told me that the day I kissed you the first time.”
    The cool scent of the woods enveloped her, and she thought she saw the mist rising out of the grass. “Sweet sixteen and never been kissed,” he had said. She shuddered and felt one of her fingernails crack against the wood.
    “If you got mixed up with me now, it would only be worse for you. Once the mess my dad has made becomes public, my family is going to have to move out of town.”
    “The mess your dad made?”
    “He’s screwed up the finances so badly it’s no wonder he had a heart attack.” Johnny touched the back of his head. “I think I’m bleeding.”
    “Bend down and let me see.”
    He leaned toward the table, turning the back of his head toward her. Brushing her fingers through his hair nearly brought tears to her eyes again. “Just a little bit, but it’s stopped. You’re going to have a goose egg.”
    “When I heard your voice it surprised me.”
    Elaine slid her hands around his neck, guiding him around so he was leaning over her. She looked up into his eyes, and it was so painfully familiar. His arms around her, the position of his hands on her back. Her body drank in the sensation like rain after a drought. “Johnny, I missed you so much.”
    “Elaine–”
    She stopped him with a finger over his lips followed by her mouth. He groaned, pressing her against the worktable, lifting her off the floor. Elaine’s whole body remembered every touch. His thumb along her spine, the scent of his skin and the taste of his mouth. More tears gathered, fourteen years of tears, until the salty taste changed his flavor. She twined her hand into his hair, careful around his bumped head. His hand ran under her thigh, wrapping it around his waist.
    “Oh yes,” he murmured. “I missed you. Just like before.” He kissed her throat.
    “Come to my house. Right now,” she whispered. “Please.”
    “I can’t. You know that.” He pulled away.
    Elaine thought she heard the zip of Velcro separating as he stepped back. “Why not?” She stretched for him, but he moved out of reach. Again.
    His expression hardened. “Are you screwing with me?”
    “What?”
    Johnny made a face. “I heard you were different now.”
    “Different how?”
    He rubbed the back of his neck. “A lesbian.”
    “Oh, for crying out loud. You’ve got to be kidding.” Elaine jumped off the table. “How many hours were you in town before you heard that rumor?”
    “Is it true?”
    “Do you think it’s true?” She threw her hands in the air.
    “I don’t know. You could be trying to get back at me.”
    Elaine shook her head. “No, it’s not true. People around here just think that if they don’t see you with a man you must be a lesbian. One and one makes four.”
    “So you’re not.”
    “No. Now will you come back to my house with me?” She felt utterly craven for wanting it, but she couldn’t stop herself. Johnny was the addiction she’d been trying to fill with ice cream and alcohol.
    “You know I can’t. Someone would see me.”
    “And you’re embarrassed to be seen coming to the house of a known lesbian in the middle of a Sunday afternoon?”
    Johnny put his arms around her and kissed her forehead. Elaine knew this