Free The Sunset Limited: A Novel in Dramatic Form by Cormac McCarthy

buy more time. But I dont know what to buy it with.
White
   
You dont know what to offer a man about to board the Limited.
Black
   
No. I dont. I feel like I’m about traded out.
White
   
Maybe you are. Have you ever dealt with suicides?
Black
   
No. You the first one. These junkies and crack-heads is about as far from suicide as you can get. They wouldnt even know what you was talkin about. They wake up in pain ever day. Bad pain. But they aint headed for the depot. Now you can say, well, they got a fix for their pain. Just need to hustle on out there and get it. And that’s a good argument. But still we got this question. Just what is this pain that is causinthese express riders to belly up at the kiosk with the black crepe. What kind of pain we talkin about? I got to say that if it was grief that brought folks to suicide it’d be a full time job just to get em all in the ground come sundown. So I keep comin back to the same question. If it aint what you lost that is more than you can bear then maybe it’s what you wont lose. What you’d rather die than to give up.
White
   
But if you die you will give it up.
Black
   
No you wont. You wont be here.
White
   
Well. I cant help you. Letting it all go is the place I finally got to. It took a lot of work to get there and if there is one thing I would be unwilling to give up it is exactly that.
Black
   
You got any other way of sayin that?
White
   
The one thing I wont give up is giving up. I expect that to carry me through. I’m depending on it. The things I believed in were very frail. As I said. They wont be around for long and neither will I. But I dont think that’s really the reason for my decision. I think it goes deeper. You can acclimate yourself to loss. You have to. I mean, you like music, right?
Black
   
Yes I do.
White
   
Who’s the greatest composer you know of?
Black
   
John Coltrane. Hands down.
White
   
Do you think his music will last forever?
Black
   
Well. Forever’s a long time, Professor. So I got to say no. It wont.
White
   
But that doesnt make it worthless, does it?
Black
   
No it dont.
White
   
You give up the world line by line. Stoically. And then one day you realize that your courage is farcical. It doesnt mean anything. You’ve become an accomplice in your own annihilation and there is nothing you can do about it. Everything you do closes a door somewhere ahead of you. And finally there is only one door left.
Black
   
That’s a dark world, Professor.
White
   
Yes.
Black
   
What’s the worst thing ever happen to you?
White
   
Getting snatched off a subway platform one morning by an emissary of Jesus.
Black
   
I’m serious.
White
   
So am I.
Black
   
Before this mornin. What was the worst thing.
White
   
I dont know.
Black
   
Well, let’s pretend you dont know then. Still, do you reckon it was about you? Or about somebody close to you?
White
   
Probably someone close to me.
Black
   
I think that’s probably right. Dont that tell you somethin?
White
   
Yes. Dont get close to people.
Black
   
You a hard case, man.
White
   
How else could I win your love?
Black
   
You probably right. Let me try this. I dont believe that the world can be better than what you allow it to be. Dark a world as you live in,they aint goin to be a whole lot of surprises in the way of good news.
White
   
I’m sure that’s true.
Black
   
Well jubilation. Listen at the professor.
White
   
But I’m at a loss as to how to bring myself to believe in some most excellent world when I already know that it doesnt exist.
Black
   
Most excellent.
White
   
Yes.
Black
   
I sure do like that. Most excellent.
White
   
Do you actually believe in such a world?
Black
   
Yes I do, Professor. Yes I do. I think it’s there for the askin. You got to get in the right line. Buy the right ticket. Take that regular commuter train