Free Zits from Python Pit #6 by M. D. Payne; Illustrated by Keith Zoo

that oath, dire consequences will ensue.”
    â€œCan’t I take Gallow Manor, and you take whatever this place is?” I asked.
    â€œIt doesn’t work that way,” said Director Z. “Now that you’re here, you have to bring this retirement home to order. Only then will you be able to walk out of its doors. But you’ll have to return if you’re gone too long. You and this place are now forever connected.”
    I couldn’t believe what Director Z said. How could I stay in this place forever? But before I could say anything, Director Z turned to François. “You have to let the children stay here,” he said.
    â€œWe have to do nothing,” said François. “Now get out of here.”
    He picked me up and brought me to the door. My head exploded again.
    â€œArgh!” I yelled. “It hurts! My brains are turning to liquid.”
    â€œYou can’t let him suffer like this.” Roy stepped forward.
    â€œWhat do I care if your young friend suffers?” asked François. “He’s only a child, not one of us!”
    The stars in my eyes were now blindingly bright. I felt like I was going to throw up my brain.
    â€œWhat do you care if we take up the abandoned wing?” asked Nabila. “You said yourself that you have space to spare. And you know that having young children around will boost your monstrous powers.”
    François walked back through the doorway. I was finally able to breathe again.
    â€œTrue,” said François. “But why have a snack of power when Tikoloshe will soon bring us a feast?”
    François headed for the door again.
    â€œWait,” I shouted. The sound of my own voice almost made me pass out, but I continued. “If Tikoloshe has the power to help you, why hasn’t he done it yet?”
    François finally stopped. A puzzled look came over his face, and for the first time, it looked like he was questioning something. He threw me to the ground.
    â€œFine, stay if you like,” he grumbled at me. “But don’t expect any special treatment, and don’t you
dare
even think about giving us any kind of orders.”
    He walked over to Roy and the others.
    â€œAs for my monster brethren,” he continued, “I shouldn’t have been so rude. Please make yourselves at home. It’s not a lot, but it’s better than the sterile facilities you first found yourselves in.” He put his arm around Roy’s shoulders. “You’ll absolutely love our tarantula beds. They’re so fuzzy and warm.”
    â€œOh, that’s okay.” Roy gulped. “I’m happy to sleep on the ground.”
    â€œAs you wish,” said François. “Now let’s go meet the others.”

The House of Eternal Rest
    The door slowly creaked to a close.
    BANG.
    â€œWelcome to The House of Eternal Rest!” said François.
    â€œYou can check in, but you’ll never check out,” I mumbled.
    â€œWe’re gonna figure this out,” Shane said. “How’s your head?”
    â€œBetter, now that I’m inside,” I said.
    François led us through the entryway. It seemed eerily quiet without the chatter of bugs and squawks of birds and monkeys. Even the monkey on my shoulder stayed quiet.
    â€œIt’s actually not as dreary in here as I thought it would be,” said Ben. “Only mildly mildewy. Nice and cool.”
    â€œOnly slightly drafty,” said Nabila.
    â€œHigh ceilings, plenty of natural light,” said Shane.
    â€œWe’re still working on the natural-light issue,” said François. “The residents have been complaining. The only good thing about our previous facility was the fact that it was completely sealed off from sunlight.”
    Suddenly, a dark figure dropped from the massive skylight in the center of the huge room. The room went dark, and there was a blast of cold air.
    WHOOOOSH!
    â€œDuck!”