Free PearlHanger 09 by Jonathan Gash

silent-screen reproach bit. It was so unnerving that I dropped off. Good pasties in Lincoln. Michaela had been quite attractive at the finish. Pity we'd got off to such a poor start. Maybe if I wasn't such a scruff . . .
    A hand shook me awake. "Would you step outside please, sir?" a policeman was asking. A wah-wah car's blue light was spinning nearby. We were in a layby with overtaking traffic slowing while inquisitive drivers peered out at the scene.
    Donna ranted and I blearily blustered, but we were taken in just the same. The extra bobby drove our car into the police yard of a smallish rural town I'd never heard of. I think we were now well into East Anglia, but smallish or not it had enough Old Bill to make me feel isolated. A bushy ginger-haired plainclothesman looked through me.
    68 . . .
    "I'm Sergeant Chandler. We'd like to ask you a few questions."
    "By what right?" Donna demanded. And we were off. I yawned. I've been in these scenarios before. Veiled malice from the peelers, alarmed indignation back, then they let you go saying you're cleared but with hatred in their hearts. At least, that's the script. I wondered if there was any such thing as an antique police truncheon lying around. The building seemed old enough, and coppers' items are very desirable collectibles nowadays. I perked up wondering how to work the conversation round to antiques. The costliest old truncheons have a police district lettered in black and gold. Then I put my foot in it.
    "Your car was reported stolen," Chandler said.
    "By me," Donna said. "A misunderstanding."
    God, I thought. The silly woman bubbled me when I'd shot Nottingham wards. "I found it abandoned," I improvised with a grovel. "And brought it back."
    "And you are. . . ?"
    "Lovejoy." As I spoke Donna suddenly made a half turn. Her hand moved. I could have sworn she'd all but asked me to shut up. The policewoman giggled at my name. The uniformed bobby laughed resonantly. "I'm only an antique dealer, in this lady's employ."
    "Employ? For how long, Lovejoy?" He gave the bent eye to the policewoman.
    "Couple of days."
    I glanced at Donna, hoping she wouldn't mention Tinker. The boozy old sod was out there somewhere plodding in our wake. Donna's face was white and drawn. What the hell was going on? Maybe she'd suddenly received bad news from Cardew.
    Chandler made us write our details, age and address.
    69
    I'm not joking when I say I was scared. Cop shops always put the wind up me so I was relieved when Chandler was called out to the phone. The bobby pointedly sat watching, clearing his throat whenever we moved.
    "That's our taxes you've wasted on the blower," I said when Chandler returned. He pointed at me and sat. His face had that knowing look the Old Bill always put on when they've sussed out your record. He must have contacted Ledger, my home-town peeler.
    "Right. Mrs. Vernon. What are you doing in this man's company? He's a villain."
    "I hired him," she answered. She was becoming as unreliable as me, and I didn't like it. "Casual rates. He was highly recommended by a friend in Nazewell."
    "Purpose?" The policewoman was working a tape cassette. Why they don't learn to write I'll never know.
    "To advise on antiques." She paused. "He hasn't been very successful so far, unfortunately."
    "Your husband's name, please?"
    "Sidney Charles Vernon. Antique dealer. He isn't at home just now."
    Here it came. I was looking at Donna, fascinated. I'd learned more important negatives in the last few seconds than I had since that seance. Even cop shops have their uses.
    "Mrs. Vernon. Do you know anyone by the name of Chatto? Ken Chatto?"
    "No. Should I?" She had tautened, yet her voice remained full of calm. It was the dive off the springboard, the throw of the dice. More and bigger lies were on the way. "Why do you ask?"
    "Your husband was reported in his company a week ago. In this area."
    70 . . .
    "My husband's in Somerset," Donna said. "Your report is wrong. He said something about