Free Pierced Love by T. H. Snyder

much attention to her.”
    “So it was her!” Allie says, jumping to her feet, “I’ll call you later, I gotta get going.”
    “Allie, please just let this go. I’m fine and could care less if this Jill girl likes me or not. Seriously, just drop it,” I say, running after her through my room and down the stairs.
    Allie stops at the bottom of the stairs and quickly turns around to face me.
    “Look Zar, I get that you could give two shits about what happened or my brother, but that bitch has crossed the line for the last time with him. You have no idea what she’s put him through the past year.”
    I stop in my tracks and take a seat on the steps. I guess the issue with Loudon and Jill goes way deeper than anything that happened last night.
    It’s none of my business, but I feel bad now for treating him the way I did after we left the barn. It wasn’t right for me to be so rude. Maybe he really didn’t know any of that was going to happen. But still, he knows a bit more about me now thanks to Jill. How can I face him again after everything that happened last night?
    This is the last thing I need to be stressing out about right now.
    “Allie, I’m sorry. It’s not my business what’s happened to Loudon and Jill and I guess I should have talked to him instead of pushing him away last night. I just don’t take criticism very well from others and the things she said really bothered me. I just assumed that Loudon was in on it and that it was some type of prank to hurt the weird new girl at the party.” I blurt out.
    She comes over and sits down next to me on the step. Pulling me into a hug, she leans my head onto her shoulder.
    “Zar, you have no idea how big of a heart Loudon has; he would never do anything to hurt you or anyone else. You need to learn to open up to people and not push them away. It’s something you’ve been doing for the past few years. In fact, you have done it the entire time I’ve known you. Do me a favor and give him a chance. I’m not asking you to change who you are, but let others see what an amazing person you are on the inside, not just the outside, let them see the whole package.”
    I realize my eyes are closed and tears begin to prick the back of my eyelids.
    Allie has a point. I’ve been treated like hell by my peers for years and since that day I built a wall that no one has been able to break down. I’m too scared of letting it down for fear that they’ll see the pain, the hurt and the anger I hold inside because of what they did to me.
    We pull away from one another and Allie sees that I’m crying. She wipes away my tears and a smile creeps across her face.
    “Give him a chance to explain, okay?” She whispers.
    I nod my head in agreement and she pulls me into a hug. Even though he did share a bit with me last night, I still owe him more than I gave him last night. I was hurting, but it still wasn’t fair of me to push him off like I did. After all, he does really seem to care about our friendship.
    “Whatever this is that is going on Zar, you need to talk to someone. It’s too much for you to deal with alone. I get that you don’t want to talk to me or anyone else, but please consider it.”
    I can’t control my emotions any longer. The tears are pouring down my cheeks and I start sobbing into Allie’s shoulder. She rubs my back to help calm me, but it’s pointless. Years of hurt are coursing through me right now and I don’t know how I’ll be able to pull it all together.
    “Shh, it will be okay Zar. I promise you it will all be okay.” Allie repeats over and over for the next few minutes while rubbing my back to help soothe me in my moment of weakness.
    I know I need to control the pain that is coursing through my veins, but Jill’s words, and those of my peers before her echo in my ears.
    I need to gather these thoughts and push them deep down so that I can pull myself together.
    Squeezing my eyes as tight as possible, I begin to envision the setting sun.