Free Getting Somewhere by Beth Neff

clipboard like she has no more strength for whatever might be coming next.
    Sarah turns from the doorway and begins to slowly climb the stairs, sees that the other girls are clustered at the top.
    Lauren is spitting her words out in a loud whisper and Sarah can hear what she’s saying even before she gets any closer, glances briefly behind her to see that the foyer is empty, no one else close enough to hear Lauren say, “I don’t know about the rest of you, but there is no way in hell I’m going to stay here working for those fucking dykes.”

TUESDAY, MAY 29
    JENNA HAS WANTED TO BE IN THIS ROOM BY HERSELF, and so here she is.
    At first she just sits, the same place she has been sitting for the sessions, on one end of the couch. There was still a little daylight left when she first came in, but now it would be completely dark without the lamp she has reluctantly switched on beside her.
    The real reason Jenna is here is the books. She is fascinated by so many books, doesn’t have a clear idea of what she might find among them but is determined to find out. She has brought her own book with her,
The Bean Trees
, and she lays her palm on the cover for a moment before she finally pushes herself up from the couch and tentatively approaches the shelves.
    The first books she wants to see are the ones with the red spines and the gold lettering. She quickly discovers that they are part of a Great Works series, a few authors she has heard of and many that she hasn’t. She could read one of them if she wanted to, may yet, but they are not what she is looking for.
    Not surprisingly, quite a few of the books relate in some way to gardening—soils and composting and plants, some with beautiful photos of elaborate flower beds and others with simple line drawings, lots of words. There are quite a few sciencey-type books, stuff about astronomy and physics, geology and biology that make Jenna wonder whose books these really are, and if anyone has actually read them all or even most of them. She spends quite a bit of time looking at the art books and knows these are the next ones she’ll return to.
    Then, on the second set of shelves, she discovers a geography section and knows this is what she’s hoped to find. Again, some of the books are very specific, talk about mountains of the western U.S. or European rivers. There is a pile of larger, magazine-like books, and Jenna pulls the whole pile down, studies the cover of the first one in the stack,
Plat Maps of Somerset County
. She flips it open to pages and pages of detailed maps showing towns and rivers and railroads with little squares labeled with names. She checks to be sure the others are the same, then stacks them up again and slides them back onto the shelf.
    With her knees beginning to hurt from the hard floor and her neck strained from reading titles sideways on the bottom shelf, Jenna’s eyes finally land on the subdued mustard-colored spine of a book entitled
These United States
. She slides the heavy book carefully from the shelf and holds it on her thighs, staring at the cover as if she has stumbled onto lost treasure, then carries the book over to the couch. She begins on page one, spends the next half hour tracing her fingers along the path taken by
The Bean Tree
’s main character from Kentucky through the southern tier of states to Tucson, Arizona.
    Though Jenna had noticed a light on under the door of the office when she came down, she doesn’t even hear when Grace enters the room.
    â€œPlanning a trip?”
    Jenna looks up to see Grace smiling, feels a little shaken not only by her unexpected presence but by hearing her state those words when Jenna herself hasn’t even come to full awareness about what she’s doing.
    Jenna laughs uncomfortably and then looks back down at the book. She shrugs and closes the cover, says, “Just reading.”
    â€œWell, don’t let me stop you. I didn’t mean to