Free Lifestyles of the Rich and Undead by MacAlister Katie

“Which line do you want run as an intro? ‘Grayson Soucek has a penchant for redheads’ or ‘Grayson Soucek likes his women independent, intelligent, and not the least bit clingy’? We’ll run whichever one you prefer.”
    Trudy Bennes, hostess of the Otherworld’s highest rated celebrity-watch show, Lifestyles of the Rich and Undead , glanced up from the mirror where she was critically examining a few lines that she had noticed just that morning around her steely blue eyes. Drat it, it was time to sacrifice another virgin, or whatever it was her makeup girl did to make her look as young as when she’d started hosting the show some thirty years before. “Does he really have a penchant for redheads?”
    Ernst, a production assistant, shrugged. “No clue. Which line do you want run?”
    Trudy considered her auburn hair for a moment before saying decisively, “The first. Are we ready to shoot the intro?”
    “Just waiting on you,” Ernst said, nodding to the small, bustling group of sound and video people who had spent the past two hours setting up their expensive equipment outside a very formidable iron gate.
    Trudy gave one last annoyed look at the wrinkles around her eyes, made a mental note to put in an order for another tub of Madame Liling’s World-Renowned Love Potion, Breast Enhancer, and Wrinkle Eradicator, and straightened her shoulders, her head held high and a smile affixed firmly to her face as she strode in front of the camera.
    “Greetings, denizens of the Otherworld! I am Trudy Bennes, and tonight I’m in the romantic Czech Republic tracking down one of Europe’s most eligible bachelors. He’s dark, he’s tortured, he’s as angsty as they get, and he brings new meaning to the word ‘bloodthirsty.’ He’s Grayson Soucek, and if you haven’t guessed by now, Gray is a Dark One—that’s a vampire to you and me—and, ladies, he’s not only eligible, he’s also gorgeous. We’re talking six foot two and a pair of smoldering gray eyes (who knew gray could smolder?) that made this reporter reconsider her recent engagement to Otherworld News anchor Patton Alexander. Just kidding, Patton, darling! You know I only have eyes for you.”
    Trudy gestured toward the gate, and another production assistant scampered forward to twist a massive key in the lock, simpering for a moment at the camera before catching Trudy’s narrowed eyes.
    “As you can tell by the view through the gates behind me—locked to keep out the tourists—Grayson lives in a romantic old mansion. But lucky us, we have the key to the gates, courtesy of a very helpful real estate agent. Thank you, Manuela, that really will be enough. Stroll with me now, dear viewers, as we head to the house and see if we can’t find the dashing Mr. Soucek relaxing at home.”
    The cameraman, with a Steadicam rig strapped to his torso, followed as Trudy tripped gaily down the curved drive, gesturing gracefully as she passed points of interest. Behind the cameraman, Ernst hissed softly to the producer, “Psst. James. You did get ahold of the vampire, didn’t you?”
    James waved away the question. “Tried a few times, but he wouldn’t respond to phone calls or e-mails. Doesn’t matter, though. These sorts of fellows always fancy themselves heroes and can’t wait to have their mugs plastered all over TV.”
    Ernst had other ideas about that statement, but with the welfare of his wife and their child-to-be uppermost in mind, he wisely kept his opinion to himself, and simply resolved to stay back several feet when Grayson discovered the film crew on his doorstep. It didn’t do to mess with a Dark One.
    “To the right, you see what must have once been a dower house, but is clearly now disused,” Trudy chirped as she passed a structure that looked like it was about ready to implode. “To our left is part of the formal gardens that grace this lovely estate. And the house itself—well, you can see how grand it is, although one wing has