Free Shattered Heart by Carol May

continued to work, searching for the reason.”
    Laughing with the only emotion I found when I heard his voice, bitterness, I ask him. “Not give up on it? Searching for the reason. Are you crazy? We both read the report. Just like we know the reason. Human error.”
    “Charli, do you really believe that? He wouldn’t make that kind of mistake. We both know that.”
    “I don’t know that at all. You weren’t there I was.”
    “You are correct, I wasn’t there. Don’t you think I wish I had been?” Hearing the pain in his voice as he continues, “I was the one that taught him. Charlotte, my world changed that day forever.”
    “Charli. My name is Charli. In what alternate universe would you think my world didn’t change that day? No matter how much I try not to because forgetting isn’t an option for me, I remember.” Taking a deep breath, not giving Phillip time to speak, I find the courage to carry on with  what I must say. “Every time I see the scars or every time I have blinding headaches, I have to remember the day the world stood still for me. You have to give up searching and just accept it. I have.”
    “Charli, he was my life. I have nothing left.”
    “You think he wasn’t my life? Phillip, I lost four people that day. It has taken me ten years to find the place I’m in. For whatever reason, I lived. I was given a second chance at life. I’m happy. Why can’t you just accept that I-am-happy? Yes, it’s a different happy than what I imagined but to say the least, I’m happy. Please, don’t ever call me again.” I can feel the sadness creeping over me like a fog rising up from the lake back home on an early autumn morning.
    “Phillip, please, just let him go. Let me go. Don’t ever, ever call me again. I am not Charlotte. She died that day, too.”
    The phone is half way to the cradle when I hear him, “I am sorry. Please forgive me.” Hanging up, I just sit facing the wall with my back still to my desk. I begin jerking all over as all the sorrow takes control .After a few minutes, I turn my chair around, and close my eyes. As if I were a young girl back in school, I fold my arms on my desk, lay my head down and take a deep breath. The tears that I thought my eyes wouldn’t cry begin. Foolishly, I had imagined that those tears had stopped a long time ago. I ask to my empty office, “Oh God! Oh God! Oh God! Why now?” I have no idea how long I sit that way but finally I stand, pick up my bag and walk out the front door without saying a word to anyone. Once I get outside into the bright Florida sunshine, the fog dissipates a little. Rather than going home, I go over to Costal Park on Key Biscayne.
    This is the place that represents what I thought Miami would be like when I first talked to Lana about starting Supreme Corporate Travel. I instruct the driver to drop me off at the South Entrance. I need to just escape by walking through the Park Gardens. I really need to think about that call. All the things Phillip said. What I am going to do. The anniversary is coming soon. A decision must be made. Since this is a weekday there are very few people here. I can just wander. Let my thoughts take over. When I leave today, my decision must be made.
    Chapter 11
                  My phone has been vibrating about every 15 minutes for the last two hours. I am not sure I want to know who is calling me. What I do want is to stay lost here a little longer in this old zoo site. Sometimes, I think I like it so much because of the decayed, empty cages. For a long time, I felt like I was an animal locked away in a cage. Those people around me were watching and waiting. Just waiting for me to do what I don’t know but it seems like they were waiting. Wandering the paths and watching for any wildlife that calls this place home helps me find tranquility. The peacocks are my favorite especially when they display their magnificent tail feathers.
    Walking through The Gardens, looking at the empty