Free Behind Closed Doors by Ashelyn Drake Page A

afraid of. In order to have that relationship that makes your heart flutter and your head spin, you have to risk the pain of losing it all. Darren and I haven’t known each other for long, but he makes me feel things I’ve never felt before.
     
    “You know,” Noelle says, “Monahan didn’t even mention why Darren’s hasn’t been in class. Maybe he’s not really gone for good.”
     
    I shake my head. “I’m sure he’s just trying to downplay the situation so he doesn’t look bad by extension. Darren is his T.A., and he screwed up.”
     
    She doesn’t say anything else because there really isn’t anything she can say to make me feel better, and she knows it. We both take deep breaths and walk to class. The sun is shining, and it looks like it’s going to be a beautiful day. I can’t help thinking Mother Nature is mocking my pain. Everyone I pass on the way to the Newman building is smiling and looking carefree. I couldn’t feel more out of place.
     
    When we get to the lecture hall, we take our usual seats. I remove my notebook and pen from my bag and start doodling, keeping my eyes down. Most of my notes from the past week are scribbles since I didn’t hear a word Professor Monahan said. I’ve been keeping one ear open for the sound of Darren’s name, but so far Monahan hasn’t mentioned him.
     
    Noelle curses under her breath, which gets my attention because she doesn’t curse often. I narrow my eyes at her. “What’s wrong?”
     
    Her eyes are focused straight ahead, and she tugs on my arm, unable to speak. I turn to see what’s got her so freaked out and nearly fall out of my seat when I see Darren. He’s talking to Monahan, who is nodding in response. Maybe Bellows didn’t rat us out. Or maybe she just hasn’t yet. But then where has Darren been? Why didn’t he return my texts from last week? My stomach is in knots.
     
    Noelle stills the pen in my hand, which I’m furiously tapping against my desk. “Try to calm down.”
     
    Yeah, right. I search Darren’s face for any sign of what happened or what’s to come, but he’s in business mode. He passes out papers and then approaches the podium at the front of the room. I’m completely clueless as to what’s going on. Noelle keeps glancing at me and shrugging.
     
    Darren’s eyes find mine, and he says, “I have an announcement to make.”
     
    Oh God! Is Monahan going to make him confess in front of the whole class? Would he really do that? I grab Noelle’s hand for support because I’m about to jump out of my skin.
     
    “Today is my last day with you all.”
     
    He was fired. My heart sinks into my stomach.
    “Professor Monahan believes my services would be more effective in another one of his lectures, which means I can no longer be your T.A. I’d like to wish you all a great semester.” He steps away from the podium and sits in a chair off to the side. I stare at him for the remainder of the class, wondering what this all means.
     
    I watch the minutes tick by, needing to talk to Darren and not sure how to approach him after class. I might need Noelle to distract Monahan like she did with the hostess at McEntire’s. All I know is that I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make sure Darren doesn’t end up like his father. Pushed into a job he never wanted and disgraced because he fell for the wrong girl. This is my fault. I pursued him, and if I have to admit that to the dean in order to save Darren’s job, then I will. I don’t care if I get expelled.
     
    Finally, the class ends. I bolt out of my seat with Noelle right behind me. My eyes lock on Darren, and he discretely nods toward the exit. I head that way, relieved that he’s willing to talk to me. Noelle and I wait by the door, and Professor Monahan eyes me as he walks out. Noelle gives me a look, having noticed it, too. Somehow I don’t think I’ll be doing well in art history this semester.
     
    “In here,” Darren says, motioning to a room right next