Free Davina Dupree Catches a Crook by SK Sheridan Page A

nearer. ‘Is that her name? It sounds a bit scary to me.’ Some of the other first years crowded round and put out their hands to touch the snake.
    ‘Nonsense!’ Dr Aardvark roared, throwing his head back and dislodging Toxic who hissed with disapproval. ‘This old girl’s a complete teddy bear, hasn’t tried to strangle anyone since 2005. Boa constrictors aren’t poisonous, they’re only dangerous if they coil round a person and squeeze. Look at the old thing – she’s milder than a pussy cat!’
    More girls came over to stroke Toxic. Angel yelled loudly when the snake curled round towards her, earning herself a disappointed look from Dr Aardvark. Diya stood back, watching Toxic for a while, before asking our famous explorer all kinds of questions about the snake’s natural habitat.
    While everyone else was stroking the snake, I had a look at the certificates that had appeared all around the classroom, propped up on bookshelves, cabinets and window sills. “Dr Adam Aardvark, Master of Animaltology from the University of Cambridge”, I read. “Dr Aardvark, Professor of Caring for Rare Species”, said another in very swirly writing. “Distinction in Wild Animal Studies from Harvard University”, “World Leader in Jungle Experiences”, the amazing titles just went on and on. No wonder his bald head is so large, it’s tightly packed full with his enormous brain.
    ‘Righty-ho, settle down and all that,’ Dr Aardvark chuckled, after everyone who wanted to had stroked Toxic. ‘Do sit down now girls, and I’ll explain a bit about what we’re going to do today.’ He put Toxic into a cardboard box and perched back on the desk, looking round at us, his blue eyes mild and friendly.
    ‘Right then,’ he said, when we were all quiet. ‘As most of you probably know, your headmistress, Mrs Fairchild, made the commendable decision to install me as your new geography teacher when that strange little man, Mr Fossil, fluttered off to write some silly book or other.’ Arabella bristled beside me. She’s really liked Mr Fossil ever since he took us on an exciting school trip to Ni Island. ‘I said yes at once, of course,’ Dr Aardvark went on, his rich, fruity tones bouncing off every wall. ‘Saying I’ve taught at Egmont Exclusive Boarding School will no doubt add to my already excellent reputation.’ Arabella looked at me and rolled her eyes. I grinned back, hoping she would give him a chance. He probably spends so much time with animals that he’s forgotten how to talk properly to humans, poor thing.
    ‘
My
lessons,’ Dr Aardvark continued, stroking his beard. ‘May be a little
different
to Mr Fossil’s. A tad more exciting perhaps and, dare I say it, rather more interesting.’ Arabella snorted but I was secretly pleased. I
quite
liked Mr Fossil but he was rather nervous and sometimes I didn’t understand what he was saying as he tended to mutter and mumble into his shirt collar. It might be fun to have a more confident teacher.
    Cleo and Clarice, I noticed, had sneaked back into the classroom after Toxic had been put in her box and were looking at Dr Aardvark with something close to adoration. Celebrity hunters.com .
    ‘Today,’ Dr Aardvark announced. ‘You will be learning how to handle grass snakes. Then for homework, I want you to write a one page essay about everything you’ve learned from me, plus draw a fabulous picture of your snake. I want to see evidence of my
marvellous
teaching.’ He beamed, then proceeded to walk round the classroom and hand everyone a wiggly little greeny-brown snake from another, bigger, cardboard box. I was rather pleased to see that mine was much thinner and shorter than Toxic. As soon as Dr Aardvark tried to hand Cleo and Clarice theirs, they screamed and ran out again. #Oh dear, #couldn’t help giggling.
    Over all it was a really fun lesson, although Arabella says she prefers Mr Fossil’s lessons. I think she’ll come round when she’s got to know Dr