Free I Got a D in Salami #2 by Henry Winkler

now,” Emily answered, grabbing onto my sleeve to stop me. “Look! They’re having a breakthrough.”
    I couldn’t believe what I saw. Katherine stuck out her tongue out and actually licked Mrs. Fink on the cheek. Mrs. Fink touched Katherine’s head with her index finger and smiled, showing her pink gums. I guess that’s something that appeals to iguanas, because Katherine’s tongue shot out and licked Mrs. Fink again.
    â€œLook, Mommy! They’re kissing,” said Tyler King. “ Eeewww , that’s so yucky!”
    â€œI think it’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen,” said Emily. She sounded like she was going to cry.
    This was too much for me.
    â€œCheck, please,” I said.
    â€œWhere are you going?” Emily asked.
    â€œListen, I’d love to stay and get all mushy with you reptiles, but Cheerio and I have important business with Papa Pete.” I looked at my watch. “Gotta run!”
    I really was late. Katherine’s little hallway adventure had cost us ten minutes. I grabbed Cheerio and ran as fast as I could down the stairwell.

CHAPTER 15
    I’VE KNOWN MRS. FINK all my life, and I think she’s a nice lady. But watching her and Katherine doing the tongue tango was just more than any guy should ever have to see.
    Ashley, Frankie, and Robert had already met up with Papa Pete outside. The four of them were waiting for me under the awning of our building.
    â€œYou’re late, Zip,” Frankie said. “What happened to you?”
    â€œOur iguana fell in love with Mrs. Fink,” I answered, knowing that would shut him up, and it did. He just grabbed his stomach and pretended he was going to throw up.
    â€œLet’s go,” said Ashley. “We’re late.”
    â€œExcuse me, lady and gentlemen. May I ask what it is we’re late for?” asked Papa Pete.
    â€œWe have to go to the deli,” I told Papa Pete. “I don’t have time to explain now, because we have to get there before Carlos leaves on his delivery run.”
    â€œHe leaves at ten,” said Papa Pete. “That gives us exactly five minutes.”
    We took off down 78th Street toward Broadway. Cheerio tried to keep up with us. His four short legs moved as fast as they could, but they didn’t cover much ground. He looked like he was on one of those treadmills people use at the gym. When we came to our first red light, I picked up Cheerio and tucked him under my arm. We waited. It was the longest red light in the history of electricity.
    â€œDon’t look at it,” Ashley said. “I swear it makes it stay red longer.”
    We all turned away. When we looked back, it was still red.
    I turned to Frankie in desperation.
    â€œSay your magic words,” I begged.
    Frankie faced the light, put his hands in the air, and said, “Zengawii.” The light changed from red to green.
    â€œI am all-powerful,” said Frankie, half believing it.
    â€œActually,” said Robert, “the light is set for a minute and twenty-two seconds depending on traffic flow.”
    â€œShut up, Robert,” we all said, as we always do.
    We crossed Broadway and ran the last block to The Crunchy Pickle. It was one of those crisp, cool New York mornings, a perfect morning for running. In the summer in New York, you don’t feel like running because it’s hot and you get all sweaty before you even start. In the winter, it’s so cold that when you run and breathe hard, the air stings the inside of your nose. But when you run on a fall morning, boy, it feels just right.
    We got to the deli, and I pushed the glass door open. Carlos wasn’t there, but Vladimir was working behind the counter, putting toothpicks into cheese squares. Vladimir Olefski is our weekend cook and sandwich man. He’s from Russia, and he speaks English with a thick accent. I was scared of Vlady at first, because he never smiles and also he has a