Free Wild Flame by Donna Grant

downtime.”
    “You’re probably right. I really don’t want my last day to be filled with books and computers.”
    He hated that she was able to be so flippant. It was Ivy’s way of coping, but Christian didn’t have to like it.  
    Neither of them spoke about the kiss or the fact they were embracing. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, Ivy didn’t want to be alone. Since Christian only wanted to be with her, it worked out perfectly.
    Every time he thought about her dying, there was an ache in his chest. It had started small, but it was growing rapidly.
    “Do you really never want to fall in love?” she asked into the silence.
    Christian wrapped one of her curls around his finger. “My parents were deeply in love. They did everything together. There were many nights I’d wake to hear music downstairs. I’d go to the railing and look down to find them dancing.”
    “What a beautiful memory.”
    “It was. I remember barely being able to wait until I could find such love. Then my mother was killed. I can still hear the bellow that echoed through the bayou when my father found her body. That sound...” he paused and swallowed. “It haunts me to this day. It was like his heart had been ripped from his chest. The desolation, the anguish of that sound was horrible.”
    Her arms tightened. “I can’t even imagine.”
    “Later that night, he died. He wanted revenge. My father normally had such a cool head when he went hunting. He taught us patience and control, but he had neither after my mother’s death.”
    “You fear you’ll be the same.”
    “I know I will.” He kissed the top of Ivy’s head. “I know if I ever fall in love it’ll be deep. It’ll be the kind of love my parents had. I’ve always known that.”
    “So you’ve protected yourself.”
    He rested his chin atop her head. “I have. Even as I watched my brothers fall in love. It’s in my face on a daily basis, but I know what’ll happen to them if their women are killed.”
    “Most people don’t understand why we push others away,” she said. “They crave being with another, to have that connection. We do, as well, but we know it comes with a price. It’s a price some can’t pay.”
    “It’s a price some don’t want to pay.”
    Ivy lifted her head from his chest and looked up at him. “You’re a good guy, Christian. You have a strong family. You shouldn’t push love away if it comes your way. You deserve to be happy.”
    “And you don’t?”
    She smiled. “I’m healthy. I fear being that sick again, of being that helpless. It’s terrifying. I always figured that I could have one or the other – health or love.”
    “Your mother sold her soul for you to be well.”
    “Will it last?” she asked with her brows raised. “What if a miracle happens and we get the Hounds off my scent. Will the Demon of Souls be content with things then? Or will he take away my health?”
    “You live in fear.”
    “And you don’t? You fear loving someone so deeply that if they die, you die.”
    Christian shook his head in denial. “We’re talking apples to oranges.”
    “Says the man who has never been in the hospital for months at a time,” she retorted.
    Christian stroked a finger down her face. “What if the Hounds leave you alone and you stay healthy?”
    “What if love finds you?”
    He feared love had already found him. It stood in his arms looking up at him with hazel eyes. “I asked first.”
    “Those are big ifs, but if it happens, I might have to reevaluate things.”
    “Me too,” he answered. There was no way he could tell her that he felt something for her. Not now. Not after the talk they’d had the night before about not wanting relationships.  
    She returned her head to his chest. “This is nice.”
    “Very.” Christian closed his eyes and began to pray for a miracle.

    ~ ~ ~

    “I told you,” Beau said to the others as they stared out the window watching Christian and Ivy.
    Davena elbowed him in the side.