Free Baby Aliens Got My Teacher! by Pamela Butchart Page B

the “I-had-an-accident” clothes. Because if it had been just one of us, everyone would have thought we had had a REAL ACCIDENT , like Maisie Miller had last year when Jodi made her laugh too much.
    When we got to class, Miss Jones didn’teven ask us why we were late. I thought that was really WEIRD because usually Miss Jones asks you for a note and if you don’t have one she tells you off and makes you go back down to the school office to get one.
    I don’t understand why she makes us do that because it takes two and a half minutes to get back down to the school office, then another three minutes to wait for the office ladies to stop ignoring you and open the glass window, then another two and a half minutes to get back upstairs to the class again. That’s a total of eight minutes. So if you’re only two minutes late in the first place,you end up being ten minutes late!
    So me and Zach just went and sat down in our seats and told Jodi why we were wearing the “I-had-an-accident” clothes. Then Jodi told us that Miss Jones was being really nice today and that she said we didn’t have to do our maths work this morning.
    I was really happy that we didn’t have to do our maths because even though I am quite good at maths, I hate doing it because it’s boring and I have to share a book with Gary Petrie. And he always picks his nose and puts it in between the pages and calls it “A CRUSTY SURPRISE” .
    But I DID think it was really weird that Miss Jones didn’t want to do maths that day because everyone knows that Miss Jones LOVES maths. She loves it so much that one time when nobody got the answers right in the maths quiz, Miss Jones got really annoyed and shouted at Jodi, and Jodi got upset and shouted, “Miss Jones, if you love maths so much why don’t you just marry it?!” And then she got kept in at break “for cheek” and got double maths homework.
    So anyway, we decorated our exercise books instead and that was better than maths. But I was a bit suspicious about whyMiss Jones was being so NICE because she’s NEVER nice. Zach said maybe it was because she felt bad for splashing us. But I said that Miss Jones hadn’t even noticed that she’d splashed us because she was driving like a MANIAC .
    I used to think our old teacher, Miss Riley, hated us. One time I wrote MISS RILEY IS MEAN on the board when she wasn’t looking. But then when she saw it she started crying and I felt really bad. That’s when I found out she probably didn’t hate us because if you hate someone I don’t think you really care if they call you mean.
    But I had been sure that Miss Jones actually DID hate us because she ALWAYS moaned at us (even when we weren’t doing anything wrong). And she NEVER gave us free time or treats like the other nicer teachers in the school gave their classes.
    One time Maisie Miller was swinging on her chair and she fell off and hurt her arm and I SWEAR Miss Jones had a tiny smile on her face.

    But the time I found out that MissJones REALLY hated us was when Jodi had one of her JODI TANTRUMS (also called a JT) in the middle of the Christmas Concert because Gary Petrie was supposed to be a lamb but he kept saying, “MOO! MOO!” every time it was Jodi’s turn to speak. And Miss Jones didn’t do ANYTHING about it.

    So Jodi started kicking everything and pulling her hair out (just like she always does when she has a JT). Then sheshouted, “YOU HATE ME, MISS JONES, DON’T YOU?!” and Miss Jones didn’t even deny it! So then Jodi kicked the manger and the baby Jesus fell out on to the stage and everyone in the crowd gasped and someone said, “OUTRAGEOUS!” and Jodi started crying.
    I don’t know why everyone got so upset because it wasn’t like it was a REAL baby that fell out of the manger. Our baby Jesus is made of plastic.

    At lunchtime, Miss Jones let us out five