Free Dragon Apocalypse (The Berserker and the Pedant Book 2) by Josh Powell

Ohm’s shoulder.
    Maximina wandered in, dressed in the same outfit as the night before, clothing disheveled, with matted hair in a dazzling configuration and a big stupid grin on her face.   “A night to remember,” she sighed contentedly.
    A servant of some rank or another scurried into the room.
    “Glorious Ice Capaders,” he said.   “The time has come to prepare for the introductory parade to mark the inauguration of the quest.”   He clapped his hands and a stream of servants entered the room, taking the companions and leading them to separate rooms to further bathe and toilet and change into their adventuring garb.
    When all was done, they met Lord FitzClarence back in the great hall.   The room had been cleaned from the previous night’s festivities and a small crowd had gathered in the room.   A servant approached Gurken, returning his axe, and Lord FitzClarence addressed them.
    “Are you prepared to begin your quest?”

C HAPTER T EN
    The Berserker and the Dungeon

    THE DOORS FROM the grand hall swung open, revealing a podium and stage in front of an enormous crowd.   The crowd began hollering and cheering as Lord FitzClarence stood at the podium, and they quieted down to hear him speak.   He described the quest in gruesome detail, taking time to make a jab at the rival noble who had sponsored the previous adventuring party to have attempted the quest, The Lightning Brigade.
    After describing the quest, he launched into a quite favorable introduction of the Ice Capaders by calling each out individually to cheers and shouts of admiration.  
    Pellonia waved, confused by the spectacle.   Gurken roared, growled, and generally played to the crowd.   Maximina entered the stage dramatically, bowing to the crowd before creating the illusion of an immense ice troll roaring at the crowd.   The crowd went berserk with applause.   Ohm attempted to play his lute, but was apologetically ushered to the side of the stage by the servants of Lord FitzClarence.
    After the individual introductions, Lord FitzClarence launched into vivid explanation of how The Ice Capaders had accompanied him on his quest to retrieve the Orb of Skzd from the troll cave and were now ready to attempt a dangerous quest of their own.   Pellonia and Gurken raised an eyebrow, staring in wonder at Lord FitzClarence, who had merely given them a ride in his carriage to the entrance of the mines.
    After the speech, minstrels began to play a ballad and walk out into the crowd.   The crowd parted, allowing the minstrels to pass. Lord FitzClarence followed, gesturing for our heroes to, in turn, follow him.   The crowd surged in behind the minstrels, lifting Lord FitzClarence, Pellonia, Gurken, Maximina, and Ohm onto their shoulders and carrying them after the minstrels.  
    Lord FitzClarence leaned over shaking hands along the way.
    “Questing is quite the spectacle in Arendal,” Pellonia shouted to Gurken.
    “Yes, finally a place that understands the true importance of the adventurer.   I wonder if they have a temple of Durstin here,” Gurken shouted back.
    “I, for one, could get used to his,” said Maximina.
    “I didn’t even acquire a patron,” Ohm complained.   “How am I ever to be a full time bard?   I suppose I’ll have to keep adventuring for now.”
    The procession ended and the crowd formed a circle around a round metal grate in the cobblestones.   A possibly noxious green mist emanated from beneath the grate.   Lord FitzClarence launched into another speech about the dangers The Ice Capaders were sure to face and some men wandered over to the grate, driving metal poles underneath, wedging it up.   The green mist billowed out and one of the men began to cough as it enveloped him.
    The grate crashed back down with a loud metallic clang as the men jumped back and away from the smoke, apparently deciding that the green mist was no longer possibly noxious so much as conclusively so.   Lord FitzClarence stopped speaking