Free Seer: Thrall by Robin Roseau Page A

my shoulders. All that you could see of me was from my neck up.
    "If you get cold anyway, we'll come in," Solange said. She moved behind me and began pushing me out the door.
    Neither of us said anything for a while. She carried me downstairs -- it seemed to be nothing to her to do so -- then wheeled me outside. It was cool, and the sun had set, but the walkway to her garden was softly lit. We came to a stop, and she positioned my chair so it was facing a wooden bench. We'd come here before. Solange locked the wheels then moved around me and sat down, facing me. She sat at the edge of the bench and leaned forward to clasp my hands through the blanket.
    "What's wrong?"
    "Nothing," she said. "But this is a serious conversation."
    "About the ritual?" We hadn't done it yet. She nodded.
    "It is intimate, Sidney."
    "I wish you would just trust me, Solange," I said. "I haven't earned your distrust."
    "Binding you to me will help me direct your dreams," she said. "It's necessary, Sidney."
    I looked away, out across the garden, barely visible in the dark of the night. "I've been trying to stay angry with you," I told her. "Being angry is better than grieving what we had. If you do this, then I'm just another one of your pets in a long line of pets."
    "It's not like that, Sidney."
    I looked back at her. "It certainly is. I thought I was special, at least to you."
    "You are."
    "Never mind," I said. I didn't believe her. "You've lived forever. I'm just another human, a walking blood bank, but one with interesting dreams."
    With a grunt, she pulled away from me, turning her back and walking a dozen steps away.
    "I thought you'd at least try to trust me," I said. "But all that matters to you are my dreams."
    She spun around, and her fangs were showing. "Do you think this is easy for me? You talk about how aggrieved you are, how much I hurt you, but there are two of us who hurt here, Sidney. I don't see you letting go of your anger, except when my wrist is in your mouth. I don't see you trying to heal the rift between us."
    "I'm not the one ripping it apart!" I shot back. "How about you go a few days being reminded, every time you try to roll over to find a comfortable position, that the woman who used to love you now distrusts you as completely as you distrust me? I don't deserve it!" I screamed. "My god, even when I was as weak as a kitten and couldn't sit up without help, you kept me strapped to that bed. Even now, when I can't make it more than halfway across the room without support, I'm strapped in, twenty hours a day. Let's see you go one day feeling like I've felt for a week, especially after the last seven months!"
    She growled at me.
    "Oh, stifle it," I said. "You're the ancient vampire, with a lifespan of ten or twenty or a hundred humans. Clearly your existence is far more important than mine. My free will, my happiness, my right to pursue a fulfilling life is nothing compared to your centuries. They mean nothing compared to the possibility, on no evidence, that I might betray you and your secrets. Go ahead, do your fucking ritual. I won't fight you. I'll cooperate as you suck my brains out and turned me into a mindless dreaming machine."
    "You agreed!" she said. "You said, 'Anything, Solange. I'll do anything.' How can I trust you when you go back on that now, barely a week later."
    "I'm not going back on anything!" I retorted. "I just told you to do it. If you are incapable of feeling guilt, then nothing I say matters the slightest to you. If you are capable of feeling guilt, and my words are bringing guilt, maybe you should reconsider your choices."
    "You'll be happy," she said defensively. "I'll take care of you."
    "I got along just fine before you came along," I retorted. "The only reason I would need you to take care of me is because you want to turn my brain into mush." I began to scream. "You took everything from me! You took my house, my life, my friends. What happened to my cats, Solange? Did you eat them?"
    "Of course