Free Confessions of a She-Fan by Jane Heller

“regular people” who find out I am writing the book are only too happy to put me in touch with someone they know who might help with access. One friend knows someone with the White Sox. Another knows a guy with the Indians. And so on. I contact all the names I am given because you never know—and because I am completely desperate.
AL EAST STANDINGS/JULY 22
    TEAM
W
L
PCT
GB
boston
59
39
.602
—
new york
52
46
.531
7.0
toronto
48
50
.490
11.0
baltimore
44
54
.449
15.0
tampa bay
38
60
.388
21.0

Week 17 July 23, 2007
    I was a free agent, but I pretty much shut off all talks with everybody else when the Yankees came calling. Now, when players from other teams ask, “Hey, how is it over there?” I tell them that what makes it tough to play here also makes it great. One, the people who come to see you expect you to play well. Two, the owner, the manager, and your teammates expect you to play well. And three, the team in the other dugout is gonna give you their “A” game every single time.
    On Monday I hear back from all my friends’ friends, and none is in a position to help me with tickets or anything else. I am beginning to feel like Typhoid Mary. Does Jason Zillo’s reach extend to everyone everywhere?
    Out of ideas, I call StubHub to buy tickets. I explain to Jeremiah, my “telesales specialist,” that I am writing a book about the Yankees and need the cheapest seats available for the first 10 games starting on the 27th, plus all forthcoming Yankees–Red Sox games. I tell him I am just biding my time until the Yankees grant me press credentials.
    I am on the phone with Jeremiah for well over 2 hours.While he is finalizing our transaction, he informs me that my American Express Platinum Card has blocked it. This has never happened to me before, and I am humiliated. Well, I have never charged hundreds of dollars’ worth of tickets to baseball games before, on top of 2 months’ worth of hotel deposits and airline tickets—all in the span of a week. I tell Jeremiah not to cancel everything we have just labored over and hang up to call American Express. I speak to a customer service representative in the Platinum Card department. She has the reserved,snooty voice of one of those women hosts on NPR. I expect her to reprimand me for being such a profligate spender, but when I tell her about the Yankees book she turns giddy and squeals, “Oh, what a jolly time you shall have! I love Derek Jeter!” I call Jeremiah back and authorize him to go ahead with all the purchases.
    After I finish liquidating my entire savings, the phone rings. It is my friend Bruce Gelfand, a writer and writing coach. He sent my New York Times articles about the Yankees to his producer pals, Howard Burkons and Brenda Friend, who specialize in TV movies based on real-life subjects.
    â€œBrenda is a huge baseball fan,” Bruce says. “She’s the flip side of you. She’s crazy about the Red Sox.”
    â€œI won’t hold that against her.”
    â€œShe’s dying to make a fictionalized TV movie based on you divorcing the Yankees,” he says. “She’s already approached Lifetime, and they’re very interested.”
    I rein in my excitement.
    â€œApparently, Brenda knows the person who works directly under Brian Cashman and could get you tickets to all the games.”
    â€œExcuse me?!”
    â€œShe knows Jean Afterman, the Yankees’ assistant general manager,” says Bruce. “She’s offered to call Jean for you.”
    The game tonight in Kansas City, the first of four against the Royals, results in a 9–2 Yankees’ win. Clemens goes seven. Shelley gets another hit. And A-Rod drives in his 100th RBI while remaining two short of the 500-homer mark.
    On Tuesday I try to get organized and figure out what to take on the trip, since Michael and I are leaving on Thursday at the crack of dawn. My friend Dorothy advises me to