Free Last Virgin In California (Mills & Boon Desire) by Maureen Child Page A

he’d wanted to say something, then changed his mind. But a moment later, he asked, “Still cold?”
    That wasn’t what he’d wanted to say. She knew it. Felt it. But maybe he, too, was suffering pangs of doubt. That would be about right, wouldn’t it?
    “No,” she said, shaking her head. “Not cold.”
    He nodded as if she’d just said something profound.
    And after another long silent minute passed, he added, “I’m taking you back to your father’s house.”
    A small curl of disappointment unwound inside her. Going back to the base and her dad’s house meant that nothing was going to happen between them. He had given in to his second thoughts. He had decided that the two of them surrendering to the fire building between them would be a colossal error in judgment.
    She wasn’t even surprised.
    But the jab of hurt caught her off guard.
    “I don’t want to,” he said and his voice sounded tight and harsh, strained nearly to the breaking point. She watched his hands clench and unclench on the steering wheel until his knuckles went white. “You’ve got to know that. What I want is to take you back to my place.”
    His place. Her insides thrummed with a low, pulsing need that threatened to swamp her with a desire that rushed up to choke her breath and strangle her heart. Instantly, images clouded her mind and filled her thoughts. Kevin, bare chested, leaningover her, running his hands up and down her naked body. She could almost feel the gentle scrape of his calloused hands on her skin. Almost taste his kiss. Almost smell the soft, male scent of him as he leaned in closer, closer.
    Her body flickered into a life that was, she knew, doomed to wither away into the unsatisfied, incomplete state with which she was all too familiar.
    “But I can’t do that.” He didn’t sound any happier about it than she did, but at the moment, that was small consolation.
    “Oh, naturally you couldn’t do that,” she said. “That would be breaking some kind of rule, wouldn’t it?”
    “You’re engaged, dammit,” he said.
    Ah, she thought, Ray. She should have known that lie would come back to haunt her. It wasn’t even her status as the Colonel’s daughter that was keeping Kevin at arm’s length—instead it was the pretend fiancé she’d invented as a safeguard.
    “I almost wish you weren’t,” he added.
    Her gaze shot to him. “You do?”
    “Hell, yes,” he snapped.
    “And if I wasn’t?” she asked, and probably shouldn’t have. After all, why torture herself?
    “If you weren’t—” He shook his head. “No point in going down that road, is there?”
    “I suppose not,” she admitted, and had to grindher teeth together to keep from blurting out the truth. Because it wouldn’t get her anywhere. If he knew the truth now, he’d think her a liar or worse and race her back to the base.
    She laughed shortly and he heard her.
    “What can you possibly find funny in any of this?”
    “Are you kidding?” she asked, leaning her head against the seat back. “Here we are, two consenting adults, hot as a couple of teenagers and instead of doing anything about it, we’re running for safety.”
    “We’re supposed to be smarter than teenagers.”
    “Yeah, well, maybe smart’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”
    Not when she was feeling like this, anyway. She didn’t want to be logical. What she wanted, no. What she needed , was to feel. To feel everything. To finally and forever lose her virginity crown to a man she was willing to bet would make the losing of it memorable.
    He made a sharp left turn and she looked at him. “What are you doing?” Lilah stared out the side window at a residential neighborhood, noting the lamplight glowing from behind windows and the children playing on neatly manicured lawns.
    “Being stupid,” he muttered.
    “What happened to being smart and you taking me back to Dad’s house?”
    “Yeah, well,” Kevin said, telling himself whatan idiot he was, “I changed my