Free No Interest in Love by Cassie Mae Page B
Authors: Cassie Mae
do love, and all the women I’d slept with ran through my head and I wondered how many I’d hurt, how many didn’t really feel the same way I did—unattached or indifferent—and I dropped my hand from my face and said, “We shouldn’t see each other for a while.”
“What?”
“Damn it, Penny, I’m sorry. But…I don’t do relationships. I don’t do love. And I can’t keep it going with someone who hopes that I’ll love them back.”
“So I was just…a…”
“Notch in the bedpost.” And ten thousand pounds of guilt dropped into the pit of my stomach with the honest words. “I’m sorry.”
She yelled then.
Screamed
. And I let her. I let her chuck my clothes at me. I let her push me off the bed. I let her cry and break right in front of me, and I didn’t do a damn thing because she was giving me what I deserved. I deserved a hell of a lot more.
She left me standing in the apartment hallway stark naked with my clothes at my feet. I headed down the hall to the apartment I shared with Landon at the time, tossing on jeans and slumping down on the couch. I downed the entire six-pack we had in our fridge (Landon gave me shit for that one), and then Liz dropped by. The first time I’d met her, and she caught me watching some chick flick and babbling about how I didn’t understand why the hell people wanted to fall in love. I passed out in her lap after telling her that she had nice legs. (Not one of my finer moments.)
It was the last time I slept with someone without telling them what I wanted out of it first.
“Um, you still with me?” Shay asks, eyes flicking in my direction. She blinks and reaches up through the neck hole on the large T-shirt to swipe her hair from her face.
“Someone got hurt,” I answer as I kick another loose rock along the winding road we’re on. “But it wasn’t me.”
“Hmm,” she murmurs thoughtfully, then suddenly pushes around me. “I am so getting this one.”
I let her take it, still trying to shake my head free of Penny. Shay spins on her heel, walking backward, waving her hands, and jumping up and down. The trucker looks like he’s about to swerve around her crazy ass, but then the most amazing sound of screeching brakes rings across the road.
“Yes!” she shouts, turning around with the widest smile I’ve ever seen from her. It pulls up to her eyes, shows off the whites of her teeth, and gives my stomach another pounding…but a good one this time.
“Come on,” I say, dragging my carry-on across the road. I snatch her sleeve and lead her along the side of the semi. The driver sticks his head out the blue cab’s passenger side. Relief floods through the tightness in my gut when he tips his hat.
“You gotta be shitting me,” he says, grinning wide. “It’s you.”
“You know me?” I say. Man, that Syfy network has got some reach.
He waves his hand at me. “Not you.
Her
.”
Shay lifts an eyebrow in my direction before limping a step closer to me. I flex and stand up straight like I’ve suddenly become her bodyguard.
“Elmo Girl.” He makes a face imitating the shot of Shay’s meme. “ ‘Some of us have to make money, asshole!’ That’s you, right?”
I let out a jolting laugh. This guy is better than the last one at least.
Shay huffs out a sigh and turns around to march back to the side of the road. I snatch her arm before she can get anywhere.
“Any chance you got room in there?” I ask, nodding to the giant cab of the semi.
“You guys need a lift?” he asks. Shay tugs out of my grasp and looks me straight in the eye.
“We’re passing on this ride.”
“Because…?”
“Because he’s an…” She stops, her eyes drifting from mine to the truck. I actually feel her entire icy demeanor melt.
“Awww!”
The trucker’s mouth turns up in a half smile, and he pats the head of his brown-and-white beagle, which has poked its nose out the window. “Yeah, Truffles has a way with the ladies. Not sure if I can promise
“What?”
“Damn it, Penny, I’m sorry. But…I don’t do relationships. I don’t do love. And I can’t keep it going with someone who hopes that I’ll love them back.”
“So I was just…a…”
“Notch in the bedpost.” And ten thousand pounds of guilt dropped into the pit of my stomach with the honest words. “I’m sorry.”
She yelled then.
Screamed
. And I let her. I let her chuck my clothes at me. I let her push me off the bed. I let her cry and break right in front of me, and I didn’t do a damn thing because she was giving me what I deserved. I deserved a hell of a lot more.
She left me standing in the apartment hallway stark naked with my clothes at my feet. I headed down the hall to the apartment I shared with Landon at the time, tossing on jeans and slumping down on the couch. I downed the entire six-pack we had in our fridge (Landon gave me shit for that one), and then Liz dropped by. The first time I’d met her, and she caught me watching some chick flick and babbling about how I didn’t understand why the hell people wanted to fall in love. I passed out in her lap after telling her that she had nice legs. (Not one of my finer moments.)
It was the last time I slept with someone without telling them what I wanted out of it first.
“Um, you still with me?” Shay asks, eyes flicking in my direction. She blinks and reaches up through the neck hole on the large T-shirt to swipe her hair from her face.
“Someone got hurt,” I answer as I kick another loose rock along the winding road we’re on. “But it wasn’t me.”
“Hmm,” she murmurs thoughtfully, then suddenly pushes around me. “I am so getting this one.”
I let her take it, still trying to shake my head free of Penny. Shay spins on her heel, walking backward, waving her hands, and jumping up and down. The trucker looks like he’s about to swerve around her crazy ass, but then the most amazing sound of screeching brakes rings across the road.
“Yes!” she shouts, turning around with the widest smile I’ve ever seen from her. It pulls up to her eyes, shows off the whites of her teeth, and gives my stomach another pounding…but a good one this time.
“Come on,” I say, dragging my carry-on across the road. I snatch her sleeve and lead her along the side of the semi. The driver sticks his head out the blue cab’s passenger side. Relief floods through the tightness in my gut when he tips his hat.
“You gotta be shitting me,” he says, grinning wide. “It’s you.”
“You know me?” I say. Man, that Syfy network has got some reach.
He waves his hand at me. “Not you.
Her
.”
Shay lifts an eyebrow in my direction before limping a step closer to me. I flex and stand up straight like I’ve suddenly become her bodyguard.
“Elmo Girl.” He makes a face imitating the shot of Shay’s meme. “ ‘Some of us have to make money, asshole!’ That’s you, right?”
I let out a jolting laugh. This guy is better than the last one at least.
Shay huffs out a sigh and turns around to march back to the side of the road. I snatch her arm before she can get anywhere.
“Any chance you got room in there?” I ask, nodding to the giant cab of the semi.
“You guys need a lift?” he asks. Shay tugs out of my grasp and looks me straight in the eye.
“We’re passing on this ride.”
“Because…?”
“Because he’s an…” She stops, her eyes drifting from mine to the truck. I actually feel her entire icy demeanor melt.
“Awww!”
The trucker’s mouth turns up in a half smile, and he pats the head of his brown-and-white beagle, which has poked its nose out the window. “Yeah, Truffles has a way with the ladies. Not sure if I can promise